me me me

sick ):

2010-04-06T15:56:00.002+08:00

its a week + away from guitar night and im FREAKING OUT! i'm super scared ): got stage fright.... how to sing in front of sooooooooooo many ppl ))): worst come to worst, i'm like falling sick ): i have a terrible headache, a SORE throat and i feeeeeel cold ): i scared i get fever ): sigh...
SORE THROAT! of all weeks i get a sore throat now?! honestly, i dont know what i want. i say i dont wanna sing i wanna fall sick, but somehow, i want to sing too like you know quite fun (: but thanks to stage fright i refuse to... sigh

school is getting stresser! so screw it! im soo tired! im falling sick, i feel stressed MYEs are coming , theres the concert and im falling sick... WTH screw it! argh!
theres so many things to think about and now im sick! wow! screw it! seesh!
well okay toodles!
phoebe (:

sigh

2010-03-25T20:21:00.002+08:00

hmm hey (: its been so long since i blogged...
everythings been alright i guess and fine...
hmm guitar concert coming soon and then im scared :/ oh wells

yosh!

2010-03-14T21:46:00.002+08:00

HAPY BIRTHDAY YUHERN & ELVIN (((: woooosh! ILOVEYOUPPL((:
& KYLENE, I'LL SEE YOU IN AUGUST (((: WILL MISSS YOU!

heyho(:
ytd was POG 09 bbq but not a lot of ppl go )): haha but still it was quite fun lah (: haha
elon kept disturbing me -.- stupid gay! haha! and IM NOT SCARED OF YOU PPL EVEN IF YOU'RE TALLER THAN ME CAUSE ALMOST EVERYONE IS heheheh! YOU LOSE!

anyway, i feel a sigh of relieve as everything is cleared (: though i still do think of ...... ...... but well i feeeeel light and relieved after the letter :D heheheh! anyway, woohooo hols (: but welll one week NOT ENOUGH ); i have school practically almost everyday except tues ): sighs.... and when school starts, THE FIRST PERIOD IS PE ): HOW UNWELCOMING ): and they changed pe teacher ))): WHY!!! I WANT MR.CHAN ))): sighss.... and GOODBYE CHINESE TEACHER ):

tmrw, going SJI for the so called day camp + rehearsals.... quite scared actually cause like you know have to sing ): *gulps in fear * i wonder who the guy is..... .... and i soo dont wanna go SJI its like SOOOOOOOO EARLY IN THE MORNING ))): sian! )):

sigh cant go retreat either ): cause of my results ): nevermind, I SHALL WORK HARD FOR MID YEARS and then i will show my mother ! haha! and maybe SHE BRING ME GO SOMEWHERE DURING JUNE since i cant go retreat ): but seeing so many ppl not being able to go, i dont really feel like going anymore haha! well sad thing is BEA, DENISE, RACH, ABBY, AND i dotn know i think esna, THEY GOING! it'll be soo fun with them but i cant go )); BOOOOHOOO nevermind )): JIAYOUS PHOEBE (; hahah!

mummy bought an iphone and im totally playing with it hah!
well IM GOING TO MISS KYLENE )):

xoxo
phoebe (:

the end of feb!

2010-02-28T22:24:00.002+08:00

as febuary comes to an end, i hope the start of march would be good... i hope that everything improves... whether in school or personally. Todays sermon was really cute hahah! pastor ronald so cartoon (:

dear john the movie was a bummer ): though the father dying was sad and i cried, the ending SUCK! and it was tooooooo draggy! story progresss tooooo slow you'll get bored esp for guys. the scenes also kinda didnt link abit lah ): but i guess it was okay...

anyway, i really hope my mother allows me to go for the sabah/chiang rai either one! the mission trip! i really really really really really wanna go sooooo badly!!!! why cant she let me go ))): i'm praying sooooo hard! i wanna go soo badly!

things weren't meant to be rushed.
if they were meant for you
they would come naturally
the waiting is hard
but its worth it for all the waiting
for each waiting, shows an eagerness
in your heart.
things dont always go the way they plan
but never give up
as giving up is failing 100% failure
falling down, getting up even a 100 000 000 times,
thats success as there is failure to success.
dont rush to matters.
wait. and you'll get the answer
in time things will have a reason for it to happen
good or bad, there'll be a reason behind it
if you do not know why? or dont understand,
the reason will come.
just wait.
wait upon the Lord to give you, your answer .
(:
xoxo
phoebe (:

inspirational speaker

2010-02-26T19:47:00.002+08:00

well as this week finally comes to an end, i'm so happy (: haha
the talk did teach me how i should study and what kind of person i am. which is good (:
with great powers comes great responsiblities and well yeah (:
i can do it (: i must say that to running man ! haha (: i will!

i'm going to watch dear john tmrw... i cant wait man (: i hope its a gooood show (: haha
well okidoki i'm going to sleep now (: byessss

xoxo,
phoebe (:

i hope that one day i would be able to find a class that actually accpets me for who i am and not for who i must be to fit with them. (:

school

2010-02-22T15:53:00.003+08:00

man this blog is really died! haha!

anyway, ytd in church. it impacted me alot.
loving your neighbour.

knowing that i have so many friends supporting me behind was really great. i dont know if i can survive in school but i have to, and just like what bea and denise said, "stay strong and never give up" i dont have a choice! hah! so i will and i will do my best (: school is meant to be there for studying, not made to make friends all over singapore. i guess there are ups and downs in life but knowing that i still have friends out there behind me giving me support and to not give up, it's tough but i guess its possible. just hand my time to God. i'm sure he'll make everything better and if they hate me, i'll love them twice more!

the more they hate me, the more i'll love them. even my sister talked to me about it and prayed for me. life may not be easy and i dont know how or what to do, i've done everything i can and i'll just have to leave the rest in the hands of God. sometimes i really feel like changing school... but thinking back, how i've been given a chance to go to TT, would totally be a waste if i changed school. yeah maybe the ppl there are mostly like this but i know that God is beside me everyday and there to guide me through tough times. it's hard but i'm sure i'll pull through.

" so do not fear, for i am with you;

do not be dismayed, for i am your God.

i will strenghten you and help you;

i will uphold yo"u with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41:10

feb

2010-02-05T18:20:00.002+08:00

its already feb manss... woah... so fast mans haha!
valentines day is coming ...

school has been quite sress actually... really ... very stressed.... but im coping (: so yeapp...
haha
thanks for helping me guys(: shalalala...
well
xoxo
phoebe (:

wooh

2010-01-28T18:54:00.002+08:00

hihi! (;
so i got a call from grace and i got into som(also apart of camy (: ) hahah its new .... so like yearh...
school... is working out okay (: not so bad.... still workable (:
POA SUCKS CORE! and i hate it! but im liking it by force! and i neeeeeeed to study POA again! if not im gonna die haha! :x physics./. I DONT GET PHYSICS ARGH!
Amath , Emath still workable :D just that well Amath is annoying but its okay i guess... hahah
chinese lessons, have GAMES and its awesome during games hahha! (:
haha oh well okidoki !
toodles

school

2010-01-26T17:22:00.002+08:00

another normal school week...
i'm so tired just going to school now man ): sigh...
i feel quite stress right now man ): i dont really understand physics and poa ... im abit struggling with Amath... i feel stress... haha but i'll JIAYOU (:

shalalala... argh tmrw got cca ): oh well... hard work will pay off de (: i jsut cant wait for march hols to come! ahah AND ITS GONNA BE FEB SOON so fast man... still cant believe im sec 3 already... hahah time flies really fast (: haha oh wells

well gotta go do stuff now busy busy ! so TOODLES (:
xoxo
phoebe(:

week

2010-01-21T21:38:00.002+08:00

another week have gone by... another tiring sleepy week...

school has been alright and everything and all (: haha can cope can cope :D
okay school yeap as usual lah (: hahah tmrw got pe and all sianz... im so tired ):

anyway,
hmmm i hope this sunday will turn out okay! (: hahaha
hmm should i wear heels on sun? dont know leh! gahhh hahah

everyday i ask myself... should i or should i not?
is it right or is it wrong?
should i continue or stop?
i dont know what to do... im stuck...
my heart wants to continue to not give up
my brain wants to not give up too but afraid... fear of what it'll end up like...
sian... i dont want to think anymore lah

if loving you was wrong, i'd never want to
be right.

IM 15!

2010-01-17T23:35:00.002+08:00

MY OH MY! IM 15 ALREADY :DDDD
today is A-W-E-S-O-M-E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AWESOMENESSSSSSSSSSSSS!

though this morning i had a fever, i recovered after awhile... went to church, had many wishes from awesome ppl, went out after church and at first i was expecting a small group slowly it became bigger and bigger and bigger and IT LOOKED LIKE A TOUR GROUP! HAHAAH!

i got treated to my lunch & TEH BENG (: hahahha so i didnt even spent a cent mannsss.... woohooooo! HAHAH received many gifts and they are all sooooo LOVELY! hhahaha
thanks guys :D

went din with family had fun and go home and now im gonna sleep (: haha
NIGHTY NIGHTS :) THANKS FOR EVERYTHING AND GOD BLESSSSSS

TODAY WAS THE AWESOMEST AWESOME DAY EVER :D

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME :D

2010-01-16T21:25:00.003+08:00

my oh my...
sorry i haven't blogged for awhile now... been really busy lately ): theres sooooo many things to do and all sigh...
well

I CANT BELIEVE im turning 15 in a few hours man... i dont even feel 14 yet and i'm turning 15 ..... sigh... times flies soo fast. well i thank everyone who's been with me and through the 14 years of my life, regardless of knowing me only a few years or months or days... and now i'm going to officially turn 15 in awhile and it just doesn't feel like it haha! OH WELLS...

haha anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YUVA, MARIA & LIANE haha the ppl who's bday is same as mine :D hahh!

man this blog is died haha! high time to make it ALIVE AND LIVING
hahahaahh!

todays, cca orientation was fun :D but tiring though ): and i got sore throat ): IM LOOSING MY VOICE ))): ARGH! HAHA okidoki hotachoki!

I SHALL GO NOWWWWWWWW HAHA TOOOOOODLESSSS(:

ILOVEYOU ALL!

2010-01-08T23:04:00.002+08:00

woah man ! the first week of school is finally over (: wooohoo and man i am TIRED! ): SAD ):
oh and i LOVE LOVE LOVE my class(: it has only 17 ppl (: and the teachers we have are AWESOME! but
I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLYYYYYY MISSSSSSSSSSSSSS MS TEO PANG SUAN ):
i miss her smacking, her teaching, her adorableness!!! ):

ANYWAYS
im starting to feel a little stress hahah! so sad ): shalalala

oh wells so anyway, will update soon... so yeap (: haha
love yall (:
OH AND I GREW 2.5 CMS (; haha

toodles xoxo
phoebe

woo

2010-01-05T20:13:00.002+08:00

hey peeps (: haha
school started already mans ): I MISSED EVERYONE! haha so glad to see you all! hahah BIG HUGGIES (:
oh and YESYESYES MY CLASSROOM GOT AIRCON MANSSSSS woooooooooooooooohoooooooooooooooooooooooooo hahah
hahaha and and err class is still alright (: not so bad :D teachers are okay... (:
damn theres already like soo many test coming upp mans.... and i have to stay back every thursday for test!!! LIKE WHAT THE!!! neh neh lah ): sad lah but oh well, its for my own good...
studies are still alright i guess just a little confused but the teachers are going at a SLOW SLOW pace so (((: hahha

okidoki! luck in school guys (: haha love yall mans
phoebe! (:
xoxo
TOOODLES

ohoh & i've not think about it a lot now (: haha it cut down (: thats good yeah?! haha
i think cause i'm focusing on studying now (: haha JIAYOU EVERYONES (: haha
love yalls (:
God bless...

AND MEL I HOPE YOU CAN COME TO MY CHURCH :D HAHA loveyou babe!

2010... time to start afresh and let go.

2010-01-01T13:50:00.004+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE (: its 2010! wow... isnt that fast ! GAHH I DONT WANT HOLS TO BE OVER MAN))): boohooo i dont want to start school!!! been going for Amath tuition and i only have one thing to say man! IM CONFUSED! D: OH WELL i'll jiayoujiayou de (: haha

anyway, watch night was the bomb (: like BOOMZ you know hah! i had fun and there were soo many smses coming in :) and so many handshakes and huggs ((: haha! it was funn (: haha

since its a new year, i think its time to forget the past and move on (: pretend like NOTHING HAPPENED(; new year new resolution (: haha... forgetting whatever that has ever happened and whatever i have experience to be a lesson and to never do it again(if its bad) and if its good, to let the experience continue to grow in me and continue to do the same (: or even better :D

im sec 3 now :O its time to study hard (: NO MORE SLACKING. SO as the days pass, the blogging might be cut down, the msn might be cut down too ); sadly but its for my own good:D so JIAYOU! and hope that the years goes awesomer than before (: haha it's a brand new year and a brand new start for me (: TIME TO START AFRESH :D with God and with Friends :D

THANKS FOR EVERYTHING EVERYONE :D YOU'VE MADE THIS YEAR AN UNFORGETABLE ONE (:WOOH! and wishing you all A GOOD 2010 AND A BETTER YEAR THAN 2009 :D

GOODBYE 2009 HELLO 2010! wooohoooo....

as this is the end of the year,
i promise myself to start
afresh.
doing my best to forget whatever
bad that has happened.
to make those experience a lesson
to learn.
to whatever that i have been
through.
& you know what,
i promise to try my best that i
will
forget ! FORGET that
whatever has happened for the past
3 months or so.
though its hard, and though they
may all say
i'm like not letting go and
all,
its not my fault that i cant
right.
i promise to try ,
but i dont know if i can promise i
can do it though ):
sadly.
it's never easy to let go sadly
):
but its okay (: cause i know, that
all i need is
God!
HE the LORD is all i need!

boo

2009-12-27T21:32:00.002+08:00

soo... who's gonna be the next singapore? do i care? NOPE! haha!
sorry singapore idol fans ): but i seriously dont bother bout singapore idols haha! paiseh! haha!

anyway, thanks for all the little gifts for xmas guys((: THANKYOU!
& life has been alright, i dont really bother bout a lot of stuff already hehhe! now all i wanna care bout is, studies
since i wanna join camy, i have made myself dedicate that i wil put effort into my work and i will study hard(: haha! YES I WILL!

okay next,
im gonna be 15 IN 21 DAYS! WOOH! HERE COMES MY BDAY ON SUNDAY, 17 JAN (: AND I'M GONNA BE 15! :O HAHA! OLD OLD! HAHA!

okok i'll blog another time (:
toodles peeps
xoxo
phoebe (:

2009-12-26T22:47:00.002+08:00

okayy! MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!! HAHAH SORRY ITS LATE BUT I WAS BUSY AND COULDNT USE THE COM HEH HEH

anw, ytd went to converse warehouse sale and i saw esna and jon(: hahha! HELLO (:
haha and my whole family together we spent 309((:
hahah happy happy! WE GOT SHOESS! WHOO

okay today, went to sentosa met, deb lock first then met phyllis, marc, jet, adam, enan. haha yeaps went there played then go phyllis chalet slack as it rained ): haha oh well but had fun lah! CRAPPED WITH ACCENTS and enjoyed (: haha! yeapyeap funn (((: oh and i got a bigggg tan! PAIN & RED BUT YIPEE I GOT TANNED (: hahha

okidoki gotta go (: t0odles then
will blog soon soon soon (((:
lovesloves
xoxo
phoebe!

CAMY?!

2009-12-23T12:46:00.002+08:00

hey peeps(:
christmas is coming!!!
anw,
camy auditions are coming and IM LOSING VOICE!????? OH MY CRAPIMOLLEY! HOW?!
ahhhhh

DEAR LORD ,
PLEASE LET ME HAVE MY VOICE BACK...

i'll pray (: and pray for me to have courage and not be nervous during any auditions IN MY LIFE. haha! i need my voice i need my voice!
eat pipagao and drink loads of water and no! no! no more screaming haah!

ppl auditioning for camy jiayous ((:
and and I GOT HEEEELS AHHA! THANKS MELLY (:<33

OKOK GOTTA GO PRACTISE NOW TOODLES!

CHRISTMAS

2009-12-21T18:33:00.002+08:00

HELLO!(: CHRISTMAS IS COMING IN LIKE 4 DAYS!!! GOSH GOSH SOO (((: HAPPY LEH
HAAH

i miss ppl ): school ppl): church ppl who are now overseas ))): i feel so bored without them ):
sian

you know GETTING GUYS GIFTS IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DIFFICULT NEH! ):
haha
oh wellll.... haah
boohoo neh im falling sick ): rawr! i dont wanna get sick ))): i got headache and slight flu and i feel a sore throat coming ))):
oh wells toodles
and
MERRY CHRISTMAS (:

rhema 2009

2009-12-17T21:45:00.002+08:00

rhema 09' is over man! FINALLY! hahaha
abby and vicvic did a great job being emcees! haha THEY WERE SOOOO ADORABLE!
the videos were just totally embarrassing but fun haha! nonsensical! and meaningful! hahaah!
rhema was fun ((: haha met quite a few new ppl and got to know ppl i already know BETTER (:

on the second night, during alter call, i cried like buckets! haha but THANKS deborah tay, phyllis, abby, denise for praying for me (((: THANKYOU! haha i received the presence of the holy spirit and it feels awesome! God spoke to me that night... i was really happy! oh and and thanks joel and sean (i think it was sean) haha for giving me TISSUE hahahah! oh and i know it's joel cause i saw haha! and could recongize by the hand haha!
thanks (:

i had an awesome time during rhema and the speaker was AWESOME! HAHA
oh and and ushering was funnn (((: though it was quite tiring! ):
hahah but it's okay IT WAS FOR THE LORD (:

i thank God that rhema was a success and awesome! haha (((:

okayyy my body is sore): and aching )): and i'm quite tired so tooodles then! BYEEE

toodles
xoxo
phoebe!

DEPRESSED PPL EATS ICE CREAM

2009-12-09T16:54:00.003+08:00

phrase for the day!
today's phrase for the day is:

"DEPRESSED PEOPLE EAT ICE CREAM SLOWLY!"

thats my phrase for the day! & ppl who says who say so that depressed ppl eat ice cream slowly, I SAY SO!

i feel awfully fatter this week ): I ATE LIKE 4 FLAVOURS OF ICE CREAM IN 4 DAYS!

sunday : COOKIES & CREAM + NUTELLA FROM ISLAND CREMERY

monday & wednesday: RUM & RAISIN ICE CREAM

tuesday: SOYA ICE CREAM

I KNOW! ITS SOOOOOOOOO FAT RIGHT! BUT ITS OKAY(: IT'LL BE BURNED LATER (:

i think i'm depressed... i suddenly keep having the urge to eat a tub of ice cream... weird huh?! and it all started on sunday! the day i became sad... so i guess its true... but it'll all end soon (: haha! no worries hotachokies (: but whatever....

oh wells wells.... haha

toodles now (:

xoxo

phoebe!

2009-12-07T17:33:00.002+08:00

07122009, monday.
today i spent the day at home. stonning again.
my mother just called me to start A math tuition, i'm not prepared mentally yet! and obviously i cant tell her why... coz she'll kill me if she knows why. and she just screamed to me on the phone!
wth!

i feel like an ant being squashed by a pile of rocks! im just not ready to start yet! nothing will be able to sink in! i mean like seriously...

breakdown ytd, today i'm not okay emotionally and i'm still thinking of things and suddenly she ask me to go for A math tuition? like c' mon seriously! can't we just start after rhema? or christmas? i dont want to start now! i have soo many things in my head and i'm really paranoid now! God save me.

hate my life hate my life hate my life!

2009-12-06T20:02:00.004+08:00

hey everyone. thanks for the relink (:

if you realised that i have deleted all the previous 25 post of my life, cause i didnt want to remember anything that happend this past few weeks/months. im sick and tired of everything that has been going on in my life.
i give up. i swear i do. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
i'm not mad or anything lah i'm just totally paranoid with my life. thats all.
wish them both a happy happy little relationship then (: as long as you're happy.

ANYWAY , TODAY
went to trinity @ adam rd. i reall y kinda like it there. i feel like i've been free from my own ppl. you know like i dont have to put on a mask infront of them. afraid that they will never accept me for the way i am. though i felt a little awkward at trinity cause i dont know anyone but there were people who made me feel welcomed (: sorry but it's just me lah. I'M SHY ):
anyway my mother wont allow me to change church even if i asked. so im not gonna bother asking her for now. i guess i'll go to trinity like in the middle of a month. like at least a week per month i guess. i know its not good but since i cant move permantnantly, that's the least i could do to figure out somethings. yeah (:

well okay i shall end here for today. i dont really feel like blogging bout anything right now. so yearh .
i feel like i'm gonna blow... i swear! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i'm currently watching the spd charity show. it's so sad ): they are so poor thing. my daddy gonna call (:
i realise they have been borned like that, they try and perservere to survive, to keep going on and me? i'm just wasting my life doing stupid things not appreciating what i have and the life i have been given without any disabilities. i'm soo conplaciant(however it's spelled.)

okay back to stuff, i wish you guys a happy long relationship(: be happy.

loves xoxo,

phoebe.

i dont belong

2009-10-03T22:00:00.003+08:00

in the morning i wake up
it feels like i wasnt meant to be in this
world

in the afternoon in school
it feels like i dont belong. it feels like everyone
just hates me and that i am a pain

in the night at home
i feel lonely and neglected and i cry myself to
sleep

GOD! i know whats wrong with me... and i thank
farisya for being frank and honest and for still loving me for who i am (:
ILOVEYOUTOO

i know i can be irritating. i can be really
talkative and well annoying but well i guess i'm that way because of a reason i
found out years ago. i'm afraid of lossing my friends of they forgetting me and
thus i always talk but you know what in the end i end up destroying my
friendships instead of building it. i hate myself.

why why why am i like this
why cant i be a better person
it feels as if no one loves me and that i
dont deserve love
i'm always left out since
young and even now... i guess i really dont deserve love
huh!?
thinking too much? no i'm not. its the way things
are around me. i can feel it i can feel it, its not me thinking too much its
just that, that is the way things are and what can i do about it?
nothing

i just hate my life. i hate it to the core. I wanna
die. cliques here and there and where do i go? no where. it wouldnt be a
surprise if ppl come and suddenly talk to me just to sympathize me. had it
experienced it.
i'm tired of problems
tired of living in this complicated
life
can anyone take this agony away
i just dont want to feel anything
anymore
i'd rather be emotionless , be a person with no
emotions at this point of time.

people may say that i'm thinking too much. but you
know its not true
you dont know what im thinking. try being in my
shoes. its not that i think too much i dont even think. but i feel it. i can
feel it. you just dont understand me
i'm sorry that you dont understand
me
i'm sorry that i cant let you relate to me
but its just life and i cant take it
anymore
first that and now this
what have i turned into? what kinda horrible
monster am i now?

thankyou for loving me but its just me. i dont know
whats going on in my life anymore i hate it

its not anyone fault so please PLEASE dont apologise for what you said or if you think you insulted me.
yes i know whatever i asked and you all told me honestly, yeah it hurts but i THANK you for telling me the truth and thats what i really wanted (: thanks
dont apologise it's me. i should be apologising instead. i thank ya'll for still loving me and all... you've all been really nice and great. i'm the one who should be sorry and that i should've been a greater friend.

FREAKKOOOO

2009-10-01T22:18:00.002+08:00

dear bloggers
many do not know what i'm really thinking... somehow people seem that im not stressed out or anything... well at least i think so

know at the beginning of the year, i thought that i had finally found a really great friend. a friend that i finally can trust and finally can feel loved by someone, but knowingly, things change and well life isnt the way you always want it to be. good things have to come to an end sadly to speak.

cliques form over years, clique splits over years. you find true friends as you grow but some just come and go.. you know i thought and i felt like i finally found someone that made me feel like i belonged to the class to the group of friends but you know as time pass by seeing ppl clearer now, its almost the end of term and what i'm feeling now its weird. i've ruined friendships and i've tried to make it good, some work some didnt.

i feel like i dont belong there. i feel like i'm always the one left out. the one being extra and being a pooper. its hard to actually find who you can trust and who you cant. some are trustworthy but they might not be close to you or care about you. some seem like they care and they seem real close but they just arent trustworthy. i know ppl who i can trust but somehow i jsut feel like i dont belong there anymore. i'm always the one left out acting like i fit in i always put a smile on my face. but you know i just feel like crying every day of my life ... its running away i know but what else can i do... its hard to change what ppl think.

i hate my life. and when i need you here you just arent. God i feeel so stressed! Fucking

BOO

2009-09-29T22:37:00.002+08:00

HEY EVERYONE
eoys are next friday so everyone is apparantly mugging already (; good good(: lets go ppl mug mug mug! woo
hahaa

i didi my art intro tonight! i did a big fairy at the side and the skirt stretched to the other side of the paper and then i wrote the intro in the skirt hahaha so cool hahaah IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF THAT I SUCCEEDED! HAHA okok back to reality, did maths and science tonight.
gonna continue science study tmrw and then hist as well.
will do my art typography for exhibition thingy on thursday hopefully i can finish it hahaah :P if not tmrw got time i do abit haha cause i still gotta study man! aaah

alrights gonna catch some slep already so blog soon(: oh and if i dont blog again tmrw or this week, that means im studying kk (: loves!

xoxo muacks
phoebe!

PLANS PLANS PLANS

2009-09-25T23:27:00.004+08:00

hello everyone (:
end of years are coming up in 2 weeks tops girls so study hard 2/5 show what we've got ! we can do it!
been studying this week (: proud of myself that i actually had the mood to study and when i didn't, i forced myself to and in the end, i end up studying till late (: haha great!

i'm so excited for eoys to end and before streaming results comes out, i would totally go party like a rockstar first. i've got a few things planned in mind so far.not everything but a few things for the first week of hols (:

1. go shopping with farisya (: for heels, dress and everything awesome !
2.go parties to party like a rockstar that's coming up (:
3.movie marathon with buddies!
4.try to host a slumber party? haha who knows?!
5.GO XMAS SHOPPING WITH MEL DARLING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
...
...
well the rest is still yet to be decided and of course lastly , obviously i'll start planning for my bday party when it hits 20 plus november! (: hahah

so many things i want to do during the holidays so things are yet to be decided and i cant wait!

meanwhile it's time to study well for my eoys and so that i'll do well for streaming! so i cant disappoint people so i'll study! for my sick! ITS GOOD FOR ME!
haha alrighties
i shall switch off my computer now (:
ahahha
blog soon (:

xoxo
muacks
phoebe!

loveyou and
missyou!
<33

bleah

2009-09-23T22:38:00.002+08:00

hey all you readers (:
sorry i did'nt blog for so long. i was busy studying and i am still studying. end of years are coming in 18 days!! that means 2 weeks and 4 days more! That's really fast, it'll pass really fast you know. So two-fivians! remember to start mugging! yeah?! we'll do our best in eoys and proof to our parents, ourselves, ms teo that we can do well if we put our effort in it yea!? JIAYOU TWO-FIVIANS 09~

life, life has been really okay lately. besides the fact that i have to mug and mug and mug, but it's for my own good right? so yeah! i'll do my very best man! i will!!!

well basically this entire week, i feel sad. well it's because of something that's bothering me yeah. and the day that comes that i'll be even sadder is friday. i dont want friday to come and i have my own reasons so don't ask alrights(: haha thanks dears (:

anyways i hope that the friday thing won't affect me on my studies and that i'll still be able to concentrate cause by the time on friday comes, i have 2 weeks till eoys and i cannot afford to lose my concentration ! so yeah
anw going offline now so gotta off my computer now. i'll blog soon alrights (:

xoxo
muacksmuacks
phoebe!

2009-09-18T22:37:00.002+08:00

hey guys!

sorry i've not blogged for awhile now. As the busy schedule comes up, i'll be starting to mug for school. Actually i've already started to mug but obviously i'm continuing to mug till eoys are completely over! i'll do my very best to make sure i get my good grades and hopefully i'll do well for my eoys (:

anyways jimin is gonna migrate to korea ): damn
why you leave me behind arh?! hhahaa
take care of yourself ok! must come back visit ok (:
i know you love me and i love you too (: hahah
;)

okok gotta run off now haha

xoxo
muacksmuacks
phoebe!

KIMBUM

2009-09-08T23:23:00.003+08:00

omgomggg kimbum soo adorable!!!!!!!!!!!!! omgomg
... ... ... ... hahahahahahahhahahahaahhaahaaha shalalalaallaa....
the commercial chao adorable!!!

watch it! if cannot watch then go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NaawDhrwJt4

shalalala! hahahaa okk i'm going to off the computer now! soo yeah... hahaha okok

xoxo
muacksmuacks
phoebe!

2009-09-06T23:21:00.002+08:00

its the start of hols and i'm starting to study like insane! i have to its the best i can do myself proud! i'll settle all my problems after EOYs i guess. needa concentrate on studies first (: alrighties! phoebe! JIAYOUJIAYOU!

many have happened and i'll probably not blog bout it i dont want too many people to know and start spreading stupid stuff all around! ): so yeah...
i dont understand the fact that i have mixed feelings but oh well i cant really be bothered anymore so yeah i'm just gonna ignore it till after exams? we'll see lah if not i'll just bother bout it actually yeah...

so yeap gonna study hard hard for streamings (: i cant wait for november ! so many people's bday! weeeee haha soo funn and exciting haha (((: cannot wait alrights its the begining of hols im gonna like off the com and do some stuff first before i go sleep so yeap erm blog next time okk (: haha

loveloves
xoxoxo muacksmuacks
phoebe!

2009-09-04T23:08:00.002+08:00

i've been thinking this past few days... not smsing a lot of ppl for this 2 days really works. i was able to think properly of what i should do and not to do. what was going on in my life and what was not. what was right and what was wrong. what i was confused about and what i just want to let go. it's been a lot of thinking and probably my school friends could tell as i apparantly to their surprise, i wasnt smsing during meals. heh.
WELL, so yeah i can finally think properly and not outta my mind and going insane. i'm alright now i guess. well thats what i think. haha... been closer growing closer to friends lately (: which is good! well besides that,
I RECEIVED MY REPORT FILE TODAY!
i am sooo screwed when i tell my mum about it tmrw but yeah i have to face it sooner or later so yeap! hope i'll survive! i failed science, maths and geography. i got all 40+ like wth!!!
though the so called CAs which i dont have was a whole load of small little tiny test around the term and our homeworks. so when i was absent i got a 0 soooo thats a sad thing thats why i failed ))): but nvm i shall study harder this hols and prove to my mother (: after hols its 2 weeks to EOY that means STREAMING! GOSH! I'M SCARED! I SHOULD START CHOINGING NOW THOUGH but i'm really relax which is a BAD THING! soo yeah i'm gonna start studying so yeappp JIAYOUJIAYOU PHOEBE! YOU CAN DO IT! 3 WEEKS TO EOY/STREAMING and then its PARTY!!! got a few parties after EOY/ STREAMING sooo for the sake of being able to attend the parties and being able to get the marks i want so i can go to the future school i wanna go and cause it's streaming and i have to work hard and all my best this yearr!!! I AM GOING TO CHOING! NO MORE RELAXING! though a little late to start but its better than NOTHING so lets go lets go PHOEBE!

JIAYOUJIAYOU 2/5! STREAMING IS COMING WE CAN DO THIS BABES! JIAYOUUUUUUU START STUDYING ARH PPL! DONT STILL SIT THERE LAY EGGS LIKE WHAT ms sin[guitar instructor] says haha STOP LAYING EGGS hahaha!!!! soo come on come one STUDY STUDY ((((: JIAYOU!

okkk i shall go sleep noww haha its already 12~ HAHAHA and its hols! that means 3 more weeks to EOYs... during hols i shall mugggg man muggg hahahaha

ANYBODY WANNA GO STUDY WITH ME???? PLEASE??? I CANT STUDY ALONE! I'LL FALL ASLEEP HAHA :X
BUCK UP ON MY MATHS AND SCIENCE MAN! MUST MUST MUST! GOGOGOO PHOEBE! JIAYOU!

nightsnights! lovelove
xoxoxoxo!
phoebe!!!!!!!!! <33

sucker

2009-09-02T12:45:00.002+08:00

okay i cant say more but to let you guys know, my life totally suck like fucking hell much now!
sorry for the vulgarities! i know i seldom use them but i just cant take it anymore! life really is fucking confusing! yes i'm praying and trying to get back closer to God keeping all my faith and trust in God. so yeah...

im fucking confused and everything and i really hate it this way! people have been asking me about what happen to the old HAPPY PHOEBE! to tell you the truth, it never existed since primary5 onwards... i cant help but put a front when out with ppl i dont want them to worry but the thing is i cant take it anymore... if i put a front some more, i'm gonna go crazy so if this few days/weeks/months i've not been smiling, SORRY i apologise. i just need to chill and think clearly now... having mixed feelings and everything and if you dont understand what is mixed feelings its ok you dont need to understand.

so many problems and all this new things come up in my head and heart! wtf! i cant fucking take it anymore! you know all i want is to live a normal happy God fulfilling life and apparantly it's harder than i thought. i guess its a test given by God but i really cant take it and i'm apparantly failing the test so im gonna buck up. stop thinking bout stuff and just believe and trust in God. it's not easy but i can try! i believe i can do it. thanks for everyone being there for me!

all this stress andd everything.. been losing weight cause of stress then no appetite, its good i lost weight but bad in the way i actually lost weight. i dont know and i dont really care anymore! i dont fucking wanna care anymore... you'll probably tell that im running away again right! but oh well i just cannot help it. i'll try not to run ok i promise. thanks for helping though but it's up to me! so only i can control it thanks for the support guys.

mixed feelings suck like hell! its not fun! its fucking confusing and i freaking cannot take it anymore lah wa lau! CB sia! KNS ! FUCK LAH!
really cannot take it anymore but yeah ok i gotta go. using school com so yeah.

love xoxo
phoebe!

shalalalal

2009-08-28T22:45:00.003+08:00

heyylooooooooooooooo my darlings (((((((((((;
i'm really really high right now!!!
the song good girls go bad is stuck in my head like insane!
hahahahaha! today is finally friday! (:
sunday is coming! kiddiessssssssssssss arhhhh they'll be sooooooooo adorable!
hahahaaa.... hahahahaha......
i'm kinda sleepy but yet im kinda high high high! hahah

life been soso... started to do my qt agains! and it's awesome (: in everyway i can think of it's really helping me in life (: hahaah thankyou God and i've grown much closer to him (: hahaha shalalala!

i saw jimin today... he still looks as adorable and when he smiles he just melts your heart like everything will go fine... but sad to say... he and i don't feel it between us anymore... 2 months seemed extremely fast but i totally forgot you existed until today again~ hmm somehow i still kinda miss your presence... but of course not in that way anymore cause i don't feel a thing for ya anymore... my friend thinks you're hot!? hahah i agree... you're the sweetest guy i have ever known... if it wasn't for you i'd be in the hospital now): and you've protected me since then... you're just like my very own bodyguard, who shows love and care... but sadly we seldom talk nowadays... it's good to finally see you again(: haha you seem not as happy as before... HAHAHAHA

I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO BAD!!!! SHALALALA!

muacks
xoxoo
phoebe(:(:

tired

2009-08-28T00:36:00.002+08:00

hey everyone
i've not been able to sleep this few days i dont really know why. somethings bothering me... up in my head...
its just that every night, when i close my eyes to try to sleep, i'll start thinking bout all of the same things over and over.! SIGH
yes i've been saying that i had a good sleep, been sleeping at 11+ well yeah its true that i close my eyes lie on the bed at 11+ but i'll just be awake till 3+4 then fall asleep! its every night! its jsut all those problems will start flying into my head... i try to stop thinking bout it but it never leaves. i do my qt and it still never leaves. till 3+ 4 i'll just fall asleep... its like that arh
its either im gonna crash and literally collaspe by sunday or i'll just collaspe tmrw ...

i just finished my geog project... i'm going to chiong some other stuff then i'll head to bed but probably i won't be able to sleep again so yeah :/
and on sunday i'll collaspe and seriously explode outta stress! STREAMING! EXPRESS! PROBLEMS! GO FCKING LOST MAN! ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! BLEAH!!!

well ok lah i not going to blog liaoxs... needa chiong stuff and go do qt then try sleep... nights nights then
(:
xoxo
muacks
phoebe! shalalala!

...

2009-08-26T21:37:00.002+08:00

shalalala...
life has been ok i guess dont knw lah haha
really ...shalalala
hmm
IM NOT AH LIAN OR BIMBO OR BIMBOAHLIAN!
OKOK NO TIME GONNA SLEEP NIGHTYNIGHT

xoxo
muacks!
phoebe!!!!

shalalalala

2009-08-24T18:09:00.002+08:00

life has been soso i guess...
hmmmm got some problems soo yeah...hehheh... arhh sianded...

anyway hmm many ppl have been saying i've been abit ah lianish?! so not true ok maybe abit... well influenced i guess... ... heh...

hmmm still coughing ): hate it arhhhh cough until wanna die liao lah wa laoo! ahhahaa hmmmmmmm shalalalala quite bored sia...

you know life has been really confusingg... like really confusing :/
like its this and that and this and that all around my brain soo deaading haha...
argh fucked up life!

oh well kk no mood to blog lah
sorry blog tmrw yeah (: loves

prayer works (;

2009-08-21T13:56:00.003+08:00

life can't possibly get any worse... had fever for 3 whole days and now i'm feeling much better though i have to stay back another day to do pba ): i dont wanna do it alone! arh sianded! ):

its raining and there's thunder and i'm scared. had a phobia of thunder since young...man... haha glad my daddy took half day today and now he is at home with me so i'm not that scared cause he's home and i'm not alone at home. if i'm alone and there's thunder i'll scream i'm telling you cause thunder and lightning and being alone and being in the dark are the most fearful fear in my list of fears hahaa... so glad i'm not alone at home...

i miss my school friends ): i wanna go back to school though i dislike studying but i miss my friends... staying at home rotting sucks i tell you sucks! daddy bought glucose for me to drink (: happy happy... ohoh you know cause of my sickness, i lost 4 kg :O i'm not kidding... i have a weighing machine at home. its amazing how you can lose weight so fast being sick but i hate being sick ... well at least my appetite gain back a little huh?! hahaa

i hope i get well by tonight so i can spend my weekends happily (: hahaha hmm yeah i guess i did change, having this 3 days to think bout what i'm doing with my life really helped. with all the wonderful prayers by all my wonderful friends i love ya'll soo much thankyou all!!!
i've changed in a good way(: my mind is soo called thinking properly now and i've started to start reading my bible all over again(: i love the book luke (: its my favourite!

luke 12: 22-34! :D

i know its a little hard to see but yeah haha sorry hahahahaa i just love that whole chapter haha (: it speaks to me (: alright i'll blog another day (: loveloves

i'm happy casue prayer works now my fever is gone(: my temperature is 36.7 now and i feel awesome (: thankyou for all the prayers and thank you God for healing me (: iloveya'll (:

muacks, xoxo

phoebe(:

sick

2009-08-20T13:26:00.002+08:00

sad to say i'm running a fever... :/ today and ytd and my temperature is really on and off its like high and then low and then high and arhhh hahaha i really hope i can go school tmrw... if i still have fever tmrw i'll have to go see the doctor again sigh... just hope i get well before the weekends come... its the weekends i dont want to spend the weekends lying in bed at home :/ and i got loads to catch up in school after this two days of mc ): sadded.

thanks all for your prayers (: i'm sure God will put his healing hand on me (: thanks ya'll (: oh and one more thing, if i ever cut myself or do something ridiculous(not including suicide cause i won't do that haha thats too extreme) please slap me awake thankyou! i'm not kidding i'm being serious about this ok ! thanks all (:

people don't worry bout be ok (: i'm sure i'll do fine after awhile. it just takes time yeah (: with this situation i'm in i'll probably just have to try my best to solve this without anything else happening and i'm sure i'll pass with all my friends help and God (: i'll think positive. put it in the way that this is a test God put me into (: so i should try my best to get this problems over with and i'll grow much closer to God and actually mature (: i may be 14 but this problems really is driving me nuts but with all my beloved friends support, God's helping hands i'm sure i'll be able to survive this battle against the temptation of satan's making me cut myself and going nuts. but i'm sure i'll win this battle as i know that all my friends are supporting me behind (:

my sissy just came home and she was like it's already 2 and you haven't ate lunch! YOU BETTER GO EAT! hahaa... now i know many do care for me. my sissy do care for me it's just that she shows it in some other form not direct but i can feel her love (: hahaa

alright i shall end here don't know what to blog bout anymore haha (:
i miss everyone in school ): i wanna get well soon (; thanks for the prayers(: iloveya'll!

muacks!
xoxo
phoebe!

:/

2009-08-19T14:25:00.004+08:00

hey everyone... i edited this picture today... well i just wanted to i guess.
i'll be on MC for today and tomorrow okay?! i'm having fever, cough,headache. :/

actually having mc for this two days won't be so bad cause i'll be given time to actually catch up on work especially art, and i'll be able to have sometime to spend my day at home to actually think properly. Think about how's life. i've not really come to my own senses yet. sorry yuhern... i apparantly cut myself. didn't want to but well i can't help it but i promise i won't do it again right?! (: believe me. i guess...

anyway, thinking through everything, mel i'm sorry. we somehow can't communicate anymore?! we'll just have to try and try to communicate i guess. i know you don't understand me anymore. i'm sorry if you have to feel that way. sorry bout everything. cause now meantime, i can't even understand myself so how am i suppose to ask you to understand me right?! give me time dear give me time. yeah?!

guess i'm running away from reality again huh?! i'm always looking cheerful and everything but i'm not. not one bit... if i made anyone of you worried or something, i'm sorry cause now i dont understand myself, i dont even know whats going on in my life. i just need time okay? i know it ain't easy for ya'll but it aint easy for me neither.

you may think i dont wanna tell ya'll anything but its not that. it's just that i guess i'm afraid? you ask me why am i afraid! is it cause i don't trust you?! ITS NOT TRUE! i trust ya'll every single one. it's just me. i guess it's due to what i've experienced? well i thought i was already over what i experienced and what i've learned cause of it. well apparantly i'm not over it yet. i'm still afraid. guess that's what happens huh?! once it's broken, even when it's fixed back, there'll still be scars and scratch marks left behind. it ain't removable.

with justin's death, i learned that i was always depending on him. on his rescue to help me stand up again. for over 10 years of my life, i've depended on him and now i'm alone. no more justin to depend on i guess that's when i have to start learning to depend on myself, to be independent. yes i know i have God and that's all i need. praying to God everyday helps. but for the meantime, i'll have to learn to trust in God again. i've drifted far and now i have to go back to him before anything else happens. i need him and i know he wants me back but now it's when i have to be independent and face my fears. face my troubles and not runaway again.

guess i've been to dependent on the people around me and took them for granted huh!? it's time, time that i learn to stand on my feet again when i fall. time that i have to learn to be independent so that i can walk towards God again. and i know God will always be there to wait for me and lend a helping hand.

if i ever want to cut myself or do something stupid again, you have my permission to slap me awake. seriously. i'm just running away from my problems like usual. stop it phoebe, if you continue to run, it'll never be solved and more problems will just add on. and i'll just get worse and worse.

sometimes i guess that's how life is huh?! everyone changes. i'll just have to get use to it. for now i guess i'm changing and it'll affect some people as well so i want ya'll to know that you'll still be the same person i knew from the start till the end. and i still love you.

so meantime if i suddenly shut up and not talk to anyone, please understand. that's how i guess i can solve my probs? or maybe i'm just running away again...
i want ya'll to know that i love ya'll and thankyou for everything. i thankyou for being there and i'm sorry i've let ya'll down again and again.
iloveya'll.

this is not a suicidal post please ppl, i won't be that stupid to keel myself. i just need ya'll to understand that, that's how i feel, how life has been...

2009-08-17T20:49:00.002+08:00

you know sometimes i feel like keeling myself...
yes i love my friends and they love me... i thank God for them and all but sometimes i just really cannot understand myself...
arhh WANNA FUCKING KEEL MYSELF ALREADY!

I'LL BLOG TMRW OK I DONT HAVE THE MOOOD NOW YEAH
sorry ppl who i kinda ignored ytd wasnt a good day at all... yeah sorry :/

life is never better than this!

2009-08-16T22:12:00.003+08:00

omgggg hahah i love hyun jung's voice haha he looks really handsome when he smiles (: awwwwwwwww
hahaa ok anyway today was awesome went to david/deborah/amanda's house to study. we did haha then after that we played with the two kids haha they are super adorable! one is called selena who is 5 years old and the other florence who is 8 ... their from england and man they have an accent and they are sooo adorable (: haha and florence she learns SPANISH like omg soo adorable! ahaha little kids are just so cute! haha
then played badminton with them... i suck at it soo long never play already but after awhile got the hang of it haha (: haha i wanna go back and play with them again! they are just sooo adorable (: haha

ok then bea came to my house and we "talked" some stuff yeah personal stuff (: haha so yeap dont ask MUAHAHAH anyway then erm i send her to the mrt [daddy drove] hahaa then erm went home and bathe and now i'm blogging (: haha

ilove today! i had so much fun hahah and beatrice! ILOVEYOU SOO MUCH YOUR THE BEST TWIN SISSY I CAN EVER EVER EVER HAVE (: you know even when i emo, with you around, i dont know why but i'll just get damn happy and not emo anymore (: haha you know guess that's what friends are for yeah?! haha (: iheartyou dear (: haha MUACKS!

life has been nothing but happiness lately well guess its cause im watchin bof and it cheers me up? and anyway after the no one else album launch, it kinda made me really cheerful guess its the songs that spoke to me? haha i've drawn much closer to God too (: haha really glad (: hahaaa

oh and thank God for gordon's recovery (: hehhehh... (: haha oh and i also pray for the ppl having to suffer cause of the typhoon too!!! Gosh its really scary hope they'll be alright! keep them in prayers ok everyone (: i'm sure you will :)

alright i guess thats all for today then (: haha love loves (: MUACKS!
ILOVEYOU EVERYONE!
phephe!!! ♥♥

omgomggmggg

2009-08-13T22:27:00.002+08:00

omgomggg i just watched BOF again! hehehehhehe hahahha...
((((((:
arhh now i found a way to make myself happy! (:
even when i'm emo... after that i'll be happy and hyper!!!
you knwo what it isss??? you know you know.... WATCH BOYS OVER FLOWERR!!! arhh I WATCH ALREADY WILL GET HYPER AND SMILE!!!!
HAHAHA FOUND MY SECRET WEAPON TO MAKE ME SMILE... (:
HAHAA!!!
ilovekimbum deepdeeppppp.......
hahahaa ok girl moment girl moment... hahaa

((((: hahaa.... .... ok smiling to myself hahahah ok retard!!!

omg 2/5 SEXY PPL WE ROCK MANN!!! TODAYS BASKETBALL GAME THOUGH WE GOT TRASHED... BUT WE ROCKED ! HAHHA WE GOT THE AWESOMEEE CHEERING AND AND THE AWESOME PPL PLAYING THE BASKETBALL GAME! WOOOOOOOOTS HAHA ILOVEYOU2/5 ... ROCKED THE SOCKES BABAY!

okk gonna talk on the phoney now haha talk to you another day sexy (: haha
lovesloves

HELLOO

2009-08-12T22:19:00.002+08:00

hello hello!

hahha me high high... ..
today was just another boring school day oh and i
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GABWAI! I LOVEYOU DEEPDEEP (: MUACKSS

ok back anw haha im like bored bored bored hah soo just gonna keep the post short and sweet hahah (:

ok the end haha i told you i'm bored soo abit insane haaaa gonna BOF now (: haha talktoya soooon

lovesloves
ILOVEKIMBUM!

KIMBUM!

2009-08-11T18:23:00.003+08:00

hey wanna meet my new husband ^^

MR. KIMBUMMM

HE SUPER AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HOTTTYYY BOYBOYY I LOVE HIM SOO MUCH OMGGG

HE IS SOOOO ADORABLY HOTT & OMG LOVE HIM LAHH

HAHAAA

KIM BUM = SEXY ADORABLE HOT MAN! ((((((:

heyooo

2009-08-11T17:40:00.002+08:00

hello!
sorry i didn't blog for 5 days:O i was a little busy having fun and studying (:

life has been alright so far. nothing special to me and well, it's a so-so condition i guess. some days are HAPPY, some days aren't. well now all i want to do is focus on my studies. i have to finish up my studies for streaming this year. A little too late to realise that i have streaming and it's important but it's better to start studying and "choinging" now than to wait till the last last last minute then start studying that's worst! well and at least it's better than not even studying and wait till the exams are over and results are out then regret right?!

so to you all smarty pants, if i need help i'll ask ok and please help me (: i need all the help i can get cause i really am not understanding maths! science a little ok but not so good ... my english, lit and history are doing fine. geography so-soo and my chinese HEHEHEHE you think?! horrible like shiat man hahaa....

so i need all the help i can get for maths and science and well a little of chinese but maths and sciencce MORE haa but remember to handle yourself first then come help me later i make you do badly i feel soo BAD hahah thankyouthankyou for those ppl who will help me soon hahha... thanking you in advance hehheh...

putting all my best effort in it! i'm not sleeping in class anymore (: and i'm studying everyday at home now (: (: i very guai (: (: hahah well i think cause got influence by ppl cause they study a lot hahah (: soo yeahh

okok off to study noww haha i'll try to blog everyday but only when i'm done studying (: haha

lovesss!
phoebe!<33

.......................

2009-08-05T21:46:00.002+08:00

ok ...
not in the mood like now soo like yeah...
yes i know i've changed and stuff so like yeah...

you dont need to tell me that i became bitchy and stuff but like yeah... i know i became... ...so yeah...

im just really yeah... i dont knw
i'm confused, scared and everything that you dont know ...

IM A FCKING BITCH OK ! I GET IT

i'm not angry with you or anything ok (:
because i know i've oh forget it
just know that i still love you and all alrights

anw
you said that i've changed "so called"
become a bitch?! yeah i know IM A FCKING... BIATCH OK !

sorry i need to vent my anger ok (:
IM A FCKING BITCH I KNOW OK
im not a person who expresses much ok so yeahh live with it
this is not to anyone it is to myself ok !

SCREW MY FCKING LIFE LAH

no one else

2009-08-02T19:09:00.002+08:00

last night it was no one else concert! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTS! damnn funn lahh!!! i was quite high at the end of no one else manss(:
ohohh THANKYOU THANKYOU FOR SAVING ME A SIT ALLL MY SEXILICIOUS FRIENDSSS! (:

hahaha yeapp had fun fun funnnnn then erm went back home with my sissy and well talked on the phone with beatrice and yuhern, david and gordon cause yh and david was sleeping over at gordon's place. hahahaa! then talked till like 4am and i went to sleep then

today woke up at 9am and david, yh and gordon slept at 6 am woke up at 8/9 am hahahah crazy bunch of ppl! haha yeappp today then erm went out to find beatrice and then went to gordon's house and left for grace with all of them...

after service was quite high then erm was jumping here and there talking going insane! SAW GAB WAI!!! hahaha missed her loads (: haha
anw then erm talked to sam and tok some photos (: and then headed to tiong with yuhern, david, gordon, bea and along the way to tiong in mrt, there was jethro, wei yang as well...

mmhmm then kinda had headache soo kept quiet hahaah :P haha yeapp and now i'm home...

dunnoe whats wrong but my mummy is ignoring the whole family and my sissy is angry?! then my daddy dunnoe what is wrong with my mummy also a little pissed off then i stuck in the middle?! so yeahh :/ anyway at least i have my friends there for me (: haha thats what i thank God for man.. (:

mmhmmm oh well no mood to blog liao soo yeapp shall end here ! well loves (:

signing off
phoebe

no one else!

2009-08-01T10:47:00.002+08:00

omgomggg
i cant wait for no one else later! WOOTS!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY!!!! <33

gonna watch harry potter later then i'll try to go meet yuhern, gordon, they all haha and then go to grace 2 haha
omggg i dont know what to wear! THIS IS SOOO FUSTRATING! GOSH ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

okok breathe haha i shall go decide now blog bout this tonight or tmrw morning ok (: cannot wait for no one else WOOTS!

HELLO (:

2009-07-31T10:24:00.002+08:00

i'm blogging from school now woots! hahha (: haha
okay i am freaking bored lah hahha :P anyway
cannot wait for NO ONE ELSE BABAY! hahaha
its gonna be damn funn lah... likelike WOOOTSS
hahahahaaaa (((((:
okay hmmm
i just needa say something mans... like i really have too but might be damn obvious lah but anyway i cannot say it until soo obvious lah soo oh mannnn!!!

welll hmmm... i dont know just have to express something here but i think i decided not to cause kinda obvious already and saying obvious is already obvious man hahaha .. ok i'm even confusing myself man goodness me hehhheh!

ANDREA KENDOZA KOH!
yesyes i love you too dear hahah thanks for the hugg (: it's gonna be added in my huggs countdown hahh (: loves lovess (: MUACKS! ohoh and must reply my letter alrgihts (: hahha love you!

okay just made a stupid blog for english and it's not gonna be linked or gonna be read by any of you cause its for school purposes and its stupid! haha what a joke haha (;

had to use perfect english well it'd be awkward if i actually started typing perfect english here and i wont be used to it soo like yearh ahhaha :P

he says he's so in love
he's finally got it right
i wonder if he knows
he's all i think about at
night

here's the reason for the teardrops on my
guitar
the only thing that keeps me wishing on a
wishing star
he's the song in the car i keep singing
don't know why i do

... ...

cuz he's the reason for the teardrops on
my guitar
the only one who's got enough for me to
break my heart
he's the song in the car i keep singing
don't know why i do...

i don't know the song has been stuck in my head for quite sometime.. maybe it has a meaning?!

i don't really know why it's stuck in my head haha... :/

there's still so much things flowwing around my head... ppl ask me not to think too much, well you think i want to?! argh! gosh bleahzx!

eewwwww hahha :P

ok i'm going recess now gotta go now

haha will post at home again alrights (:

LOVES!

hello world!

2009-07-29T14:07:00.002+08:00

helloo my fantabulous friendsz! hahahaa...
first of all i wanna tell you that

ILOVE YOU MY FANTABULOUS ANDREA KOH! AHAHA
YESYES YOU'RE AWESOME AND HERE IS YOUR AWESOME POST BY YOUR O-SO AWESOME FANTABULICIOUS FRIEND PHOEBE!!! (:
YESYESS I OWE YOU A HUG HAHA TMRW OKK ((((: HAHA

anw,
today woke up at 8am and then went running at 8.30am (: haha and yes i didn't oversleep i actually woke up to run ! WOOTS! soo yeahh went running and well have been losing weight this few days and its like AWESOME! haha ok lets just hope tmrw i'll be able to pass 2.4 yeah (: thanks for all the encouragements ppl (: haha ok now i'm like rotting at home cause today also got mc and im ok (: hahaa feeling better already and guess what i regain my energy and not feel tired alreadies mans...! (: happyhappy!

ok now.
a prayer i need to pray !

Dear God,
i pray that you will put your healing hands unto
melissa chow and my daddy that they will be okay. pray that mel's fever will
subside and that she will be feeling better and will be able to get back to
school as soon as possible. pray that you will just heal her with your healing
hands lord. and lord i pray that you will also put your healing hands on my
father as he goes through a heart scan at 2pm [which is now] today that he will
not have any medical issues lord. and pray that he will come home safely and
without any medical problems. pray that you will put your healing hands on them
and that they will get well and will not fall ill lord. i thank you
lord.
in Jesus most precious name
AMEN!

i also would like you guys to pray for my daddy and for mel to get well soon (: pray that my daddy will not have any medical issues. and that he will be ok (: and mel to get well from her fever! (:
thanks love you guys loads!

POEMS!

2009-07-28T18:07:00.004+08:00

ok wrote 2 poems during cell on sunday haha it kinda popped into my head.. debdeb says its cheesy lol...

poem 1: SMILE (:

Smile cause your happy
Smile casue you make people happy
Smile cause it makes your day
Smile cause i'm here today!

POEM 2: LAUGHTER :D
laughter is a sign of hppiness
happiness is a sign of joy
joy is a sign of contentment &...
laughter is a sign of your
presence!
THE END! (;

(:

2009-07-28T14:06:00.004+08:00

hey...
today got send home at 9.45am from school cause i was coughing lol...
anw,
went to the doctors and got a mc for today and tmrw (: hahaa
okk
anywa now im damnn happy let me tell you why!

: i was listening to a song... then i kinda thought bout alot of stuff...
though i've changed, became more emotional and sensitive, i realised that i was soo blessed and i thank God for that...

the song & my thoughts made me realise how many wonderful friends i have around me... though i have many friendship probs and stuff, they've always been there for me (:

and the new friends i made (: made me realise i have more good friends to come by... whether in school or church ((:
found friends who actually understood and care for me... maybe life isnt that bad i guess though im still thinking about a lot of stuff but i do thank God for this wonderful friends i've found (:

getting to know the ppl that i just knew not long ago from church, brought hope for me (: hahaa...

it showed me that there were ppl caring for me (: and i feel blessed by it hahaaa

yuhern aka kor was always there for me when i needed (: like the best older brother you can ever have (:

gordon a good friend you can always count on (: he'll understand when it comes to complications(:

deborah~ the older sister you can have ahha close and sweet friend (: she'll be there when you need her hahaa always happy and cheerful to cheer your day up!

david liu ~ the little bro you can have hahaaaaa... nonsensical and funn ! hahaa bored? wanna have fun? go to him haha full of nonsense can cheer your day upp (:

beatrice~ the awesome best friend you can ever have! she'll be there when you need her... need a hug?! go to her haha she'll cheer up your day with her funny self (:

and all my other church friends! ALL LOVABLE AND FUNN (: AND PPL YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON! GOT ALOT MORE BUT IM DROWSY NOW AND LAZY TO TYPE SOO YEAHH JUST KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU! AND YES THE YOU IS "YOU WHO'S READING THIS BLOG POST NOW (:"

MELISSA CHOW!~ the best girlfriend you can ever have
... she'll talk to you and if you need help go to her too ! i can always count on (:

SCHOOL PPL LOVE YOU TOO (:
soo yeahh I LOVE YOU MY DEAREST FRIENDS (: YOU'VE MADE MY LIFE A WONDERFUL ONE AND ALWAYS BEING THERE FOR ME (: LOVE YOU GUYS MUCHH ! MUACKS! ♥♥

anyway took medicine soo gonna take a nap now drowsy mann haha okk lovesss :D

sian....

2009-07-26T22:42:00.002+08:00

ok life has been like suckish...
life stinks...
people say that i've changed... ... ...
they said that i've been more sensitive and emotional...
i dont know... they say i might be having depression and all but i really dont agree...
okk this is like ARGHINGGGGGGGGGGGG
like ok like... everything, has been HORRIBLE!
everyone spreading... everyone knows, im worrying bout ppl,
everythings in my heart and i'm gonna blow!
I SHOULD GO COUNSELLING!
ok i have too i really wanna die le!
its painful and confusing and arghhhhhhh
i cant concentrate in school and my brain is blank and stuff!!!
goshhh okk im just totally fustrated now soo yeahh sorry ppl
just ignore me now okk!
loves! :/

sian...

2009-07-25T11:59:00.003+08:00

i've been wondering and ever since, i'm really worried for you dear.
please, i'm here for you dear... please everyone is worrying bout you... you dont tell me or anyone anything now... dont keep it to yourself... it's not good... dear...

i dont know whats going on but i know it's not right... you've changed... and yes i've changed i admit but we just ain't that close anymore dear... whats wrong... i think we just need to sit down and talk dear.

i dont know what has been going on with your life or anything but i know it aint good cause you've changed into another person... and i'm really worried bout you... i may not seem to but just know that i'm here for you ok?!

dont run away from your troubles dear... i dont want you to end up like how i did. yes you've been through more than me but i know how it feels dear... i do... i'm the sort where i run away from my troubles i hide... i dont solve it, i dont fight it, I RUNAWAY... i'm that sort... soo
please dear... dont do this... seriously if you need to talk i'm here. i'm not gonna force you or anything just to let you know that I AM HERE for you... ok?

iloveyou dear...
phoebe (:

RAWR! happy belated bday tooo... ..... BODY ACHE ! BLEAH!

2009-07-23T21:12:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BELATED BDAY TO GORDON...
hehheh wanted to post it ytd but i came home at 10.30 and my mama scolded me soo i didnt dare to on com soo i shall do it today then hehheh... anyway i already wished him at 12.01am on 22072009 (: soo i'm still the first to wish him ahahahaa...

NEXT:
HAPPY BELATED BDAY TO MIYUKI TOO (: LOVE YOU!~

okk anw today i was damnnn high dunnoe why! soo today after school, stayed back for literature class drama thingy haha i had fun haha casue i totally went high for like nth haha :P

soo today i'm in a good mood quite rare aahahaha...
okk ytd

ytd damnn funn tooo
went to debdeb's house after school and like "study" at least i did like 2 part of a question ok! hahaa then went out to the playground with yuhern, deb, david and met gordon there... mmhmmm played and went to the pool and they started throwing here and there and casue i wearing school uni they cannot throw me in MUAHAHAHA! then i sat there and sing... they splash water i scream! [IT RHYMES!] anw then did crunches and push ups with debdeb and ate dinner and headed home haha thats why soo late then go home :P haha sorry mummyy ahha :P

soo today yeapp funn ytd also funn hahaha lalalla okk i'm like highing now no reason's why haha...
lalalala....

rare to be in this mood soo treasure it i guess?! BODY ACHE!

okk loves! byesssss

GOODBYEE ALL YOU SEXY PPL READING! :)

18 july 2009

2009-07-20T18:08:00.002+08:00

ok on the 18 july 09,
woke up at 9am... david liu called me ahhaa... then packed everything, ate breakfast, changed and waited for yuhern... yuhern came at around 10.30 around there... then packed all the prezzies and headed to take a cab down to david's place haha...
reached there at around 11.30 and then headed out to basketball court at 12. then yh and david played bball and cause i scared of ball they bounce the ball to me instead of throwing to me haha how nice haha(: then i shot somee hoops and yeahh ahaha (: then headed bacck to david's house and ate lunch... then debdeb, me, yh and david headed out for tiong and then to gordon's house (:

AT GORDON POON'S HOUSE :)

~ ppl played rockbandd and i started singing lol... soo i played lahh
then i kinda lost my voice cause of singing lol and i sang rubbish for most of the song cause i didnt know the song lol...

~ everyone slowly then started arriving... church ppl, vs ppl, his primary school ppl then we headed down to the pool there...

~ then had the intro circle thingy dunnoe lahh ask gordon... then went to play lah... practically almost everyone got wet lahh yeahh then like stupid gordon poon pulled me and pushed me into the pool and then bea got wet and slowly everyone...

~thenn deb deb went to help at bbq-ingg and i was stonning lah hahaaa... then gordon pools me into water again ): and yeahh we then went to get whipcream and we smashed it on gordon and abby! sorry abby! ahhaa...

~then splash coke and HL chocolate milk on ppl and they were splashing cold water on ppl too and i got splashed and it was FREEZING COLDDDDD!!!!

~ then erm yuhern was doing the stupid nobody dance lol

~soon we started to clear up a little... then ppl started to leave and then we went to cut the cake before more ppl left and smashed a few pieces into gordon's face lol... looks creepy hahaa...then ermm yeahh

~ everyone took picspicss and gordon walked wei yang, samantha and claudia to the mrt and we (the rest of the ppl left aka only the church ppl hahaaa )

~ while clearing up, debdeb, bea and i were putting flowers on our hair no idea why then suddenly just kept talking in accents... debdeb was indian, beatrice was filipino, i was british, kezia was chinese from china... lol damnn funn lahh

~ headed up to gordon's house and waited for him while waiting, we played rockbandd and i sang till no voice again lol... then after a while, headed up to the roof graden to play truth or dare.

~ ok yeahh aint gonna describe truth or dare cause you dont wanna know hehheh... yeapp

~ then we left at 12 + around there and i went to bea's house to sleepover! (: i bathed then bea bathed then yuhern "the awesome" and gordon the "jun pyo hyung" called and we talked till 2 am and went to sleep cause energy was low haha played too much hahaa.

__________________________________________________
yup was fun fun funn..
(:(:(: I HAD A BLASTTTT HAHAHA (:

loveya<3>

its finally out...

2009-07-12T22:31:00.002+08:00

today went to gordon's house after church watched silent hill which was stupid!

soo yeahh went back home...

and i am just soo i dont care anymore!

yeahh so talked to gordon bout it and yeahh its totally out and yeahh

i kinda expected the answer so yeah...

moodless lah soo mmhmmm....

im okay ppl dont worry lah im fineee... i wont die! ahahha

soo yeahh.. well im going to off com now yeahh soo yeahhh

loves...

well somethings are expected soo yeahh
face the fact though im kinda running away from it
already
cause apparantly i'm just pretending and thinking that i am
moodless but i guess im not... soo yeahh... i'm just running away again :/
well thats who i am.... :/

i hate my life...

2009-07-11T22:50:00.001+08:00

today was another horrible day... besides the fact that i "bumped" into yuhern at j8 with my parents...

yeahh

confused and scared mann...

moodswinging again.... emo today sia...

all i can relate now is the song my immortal by evanescence

gosh no mood to post so yeah

SOMETIMES I WISH LIFE ISNT COMPLICATED
JUST A NORMAL LIFE...
BUT
WHAT....
LIFE HAVE TO BE MIXED WITH RELATIONSHIPS... SCREWED UP STUFF AND
GOOD
STUFF
I TOTALLY SCREW UP MY LIFE THIS TIME! SUCKED MAN...
I'M
JUST GONNA HIDE IN A DARK CORNER ALONE WHERE NO ONE CAN FIND ME AND
RUNAWAY
FROM REALITY OR I'LL JUST SIT IN THE RAIN SO NO ONE WILL KNOW I'M CRYING
OR
I'LL JUST HIDE UNDER A ROCK AND RUNNING AWAY FROM MY EMOTIONS, PROBLEMS AND
REALITY AGAIN! STUPID PHOEBE!

SICKK

2009-07-10T10:55:00.002+08:00

haha today didn't go school i had a cold and a slight headache... doctor gave me disgusting cough syrup one flu tablet and one vasican tablet[whatever that is ] hahaha

the medicine is making mee super drowsyyy now haha

soo im gonna take a little nappy soo yeahh...

haha miss you guys in school and i know you alll will miss me to haha (: haha

well see you on monday hopefully hahaah

hahaa ok seriously i'm gonna sleep now haha cant stop sneezing and yawning and coughing mann! arghhhh

life is like a roller coaster ride...
sometimes good thigns happen but they come to an end real
quickly some times bad things happen and they ocme to an end fast too
but most of the time when bad things happen it seldom come to
an end
unlike good things, 'ALL GOOD THINGS HAVE TO COME TO AN END'
well which is soo true but seldom but still possible, good things can also stay
for a life time and not disappear all you have to do is BELIEVE.

I CANT HELP IT IF YOU LOOK LIKE AN ANGEL, CANT HELP IT IF I
WANNA KISS YOU IN THE RAIN SO.. COME FEEL THIS MAGIC I'VE BEEN FEELING SINCE I
MET YOU . CANT HELP IT IF THERES NO ONE ELSE.... MMM I CANT HELP
MYSELF....

i fell in lovee!

2009-07-09T16:29:00.002+08:00

omgomggg i'm totally in love with the song "hey stephen" by taylor swift man!!!! goshh its damnn nice!!! (:
ok today my friends say im mood swinging again! hahah :P i cant help it! i dont even know that im mood swinging myself lah!

lol oh well...

lalala

ookkk im still confused siaa!!! arghhhh

i hate it omg! just leave me alone mann arghhh

arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i just wanna go to a place facing the sea and screammm my head out without anyone thinking that im weird! goshhh

anywayyy i love the song hey stephennn mann

especially the lyrics damnn sweet cann! like omgg lahh

'Cause I can't help it if you look like an angelCan't help it if I wanna kiss you in the rain so
Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you
Can't
help it if there's no one else
Mmm, I can't help myself

BLEAHHHHHH~~~~

2009-07-08T22:59:00.002+08:00

hellooooo...

today moodswings again!!!

arghhhhhhhhhh happy then sad then hyper then happy arghhhh!!!

shits mannnnn

stop it stupid brain ! hahah

ok relax people i'm not really gonna kill myself i'm just saying lahh

arghhhh hate my life sia.!!!

hahahaa

damnn itttt okk i kinda have to off com noww soo yeahh okok got to go....

hahahahha (((:

lovesloves♥♥

phoebe! ♥♥

life can be so hard that i dont want to live anymore
but for the sick of people i'll live and besides
killing myself will only bring me to hell
so whats the point of ending life right!
well just endure it and live phoebe! you can do it!

stressed? emo? what the hell is wrong with me!

2009-07-07T17:19:00.001+08:00

today was the worst day...

going to school being emo is one thing but then the next moment i was high and then emo again and now im emotionless! ...

feel like dying... just feel like commiting suicide today....

i wanna get sick! just let me get sick and let me have a day or two of break!

oh goshh...

all i wanna do is just sit at a dark corner and cry...

all this will be over in just a flash

i just wanna die now...

it'll be soo much better if i actually ended my life now but

i'll definitely go to hell and live in fire forever

and thats worse than this.

so i wont keel myself....

instead

i'll just sit in a dark corner in the rain and just stay there

ppl wouldnt know that im crying cause im in the rain........

well i knew it from the start that i would never fine the

guy... i never deserve love anw...

im just a piece of useless crap.

im not smart, not pretty, not anything like my other friends.

falling for someone is like super painful

i dunnoe maybe its cause i never felt this way before

i hate it.... i guess i'm just gonna cry myself to sleep...

well got to go now...

not much of a mood... so yeah

bye...

sometimes loving someone
can be sooo damn painful
crying myself to sleep
isnt gonna work...
i guess
sooner or later the time will
come....
meantime lets be strong
phoebe!
y0u have friends that are there for you
always soo dont be
sad phoebe cheer up! CHEER
UP!

funfun funn

2009-07-06T21:31:00.002+08:00

last night, me, gordon, yuhern, deborah, beatrice had conference at night till everyone slowly put down one by one and i slept at 4.06am hahaa

MORNING:

woke up at 9.35am then fell asleep again then woke up at 10.10 and realise i overslept hahaaaa so called the rest to wake them up and then headed to meet them at aljunied mrt and headed to tampanies then we wanted to watch a horror movie but decided not to hahaa...

AFTERNOON:

[me,gordon,elvin,deb's bro(david), deb, yuhern and beatrice]

we headed to deborah's house and studied.

i did my lit and maths and english [part of english] hahahaa yeah then rested and talked and do homework again. yeah

then we rested and played card games at around 6pm and elvin left...

EVENING:

went to the playground with the rest and played hahaa i sat on the swing.. it's been years since i sat on a swing haha we had a blast!!! hahaha

yeah then headed off to mrt with beatrice while gordon and yuhern stayed on. yeap and now i'm blogging (:

NOW:

it was damn fun today though we were studying and doing homework, we did it in a group hahaha wosh! hahaha

and had help mans! hahah good lah hahaha LETS GO STUDY AGAIN! (: hahaah damn funn hahaa

_________________________________________________

i have fallen for you even deeper each day...
only if you actually knew.....
sometimes life isnt the way we always want it to
its a fact that we must know...

today ...

2009-07-05T21:04:00.002+08:00

today , went to church and then went out to lunch and headed to gordon's house.

hahah played with gordon's dog , BEBE and then they played xbox hahaaa hahaaa and we watched a show callled doom haaaa

yeahh gross but cool haaa

yeah then headed home. took train with yuhern and yup went home ate dinner and now posting.

i was watching war of the worlds just now and it was super sad. this little girl lost her brother cause the aliens bombed the place but it turns out at the end that he lived but was disfigured. though he was disfigured, he was a brave loving brother. i would want a brother like this. i miss my younger sister. i cannot help but cry when i talk about her so yeah.

well i guess i shall stop here. i had fun in gordon's place hahaa but his mum was kinda scary man. yarh... so yupp

well gtg now byesss

life is never the way you want
it.
things come and go
so do people.
some good things just arent meant to
last
but some good things last for your whole
life
i guess some things are just meant to
be.
all i have to is just face the fact that
people come and go
not all good things stay
forever.
most good things have to come to an
end.
well that's what people say.
what do you think?
just missing angel makes me
cry...........

HELLO

2009-07-04T23:17:00.002+08:00

today went to help out in church event at pulau ubin haahaaa had fun..... will elaborate in details on another day.
now damn tired... after this short post im gonna sleep. soo yeahh i had fun today and now damn tired and sleepy and helping out in event rocks

well signing off
phoebe! [details on next post tmrw or monday.]

SMILES

2009-07-01T22:38:00.004+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOELLE CHEW!!! MISS CHEWYYYY HAHAAA
ILOVEYOU! MUACKS!
_________________________________________________

today i'm H.A.P.P.Y! (((: HAHAA...
gordon tried tricking me just now haha but he failed aww hahaahaah that shows i learned from the tricked that i was tricked by joshua lui! :(
_________________________________________________
today after school went swensens at J8 for joelle's birthday was the bomb... though i didnt eat much cause i was smsing butttt i ate full enough ahhaaa.... hahahaaa
sooo yeahh thats bout it soo sad FARISYA is sick!!!
__________________________________________________
GET WELL SOON FARISYA! ILOVE YOU!!! MUACKSSS.... MUST COMEBACK TO SCHOOL SOON OKKK!HAHHA WE'LL MISS YOU ! :) HAHA

okidoki

signing off

phoebe!

sometimes people just have stupid mood
swings hahaa...
one moment happy one moment
sad
thats life
live with it!

what is true love?

2009-06-30T20:56:00.004+08:00

i've been really confused lately...
what does it really feel like to be really in love with someone...
after all this crazy stuff here and there...
i dont know... i am confused... hahaaa

i have a friend, she has been good friends with this person... then erm she doesnt know if she likes him. she enjoys talking to him and just hearing him makes her smile. she enjoys his presence and just simply like being with him. she thinks she has a crush on him but she doesn't know if that is a crush or just an admire? advice on tagboard if you may thanks haha cause i still kinda have to reply to her question (: thanks

life is hard
and i still think
im worthless and
useless
i cant study, i cant do anything
right
i screw up my own life and now i
regret.
no one loves me everyone hates
me
no one cares about me in this world.
they only pretend. at least i
think,,,
i dont know what im
thinking...........
now all i have left is God and thats
all i need
apparantly because deep down, i know
i'll never be loved by someone else
other than my parents.
who am i kidding...
:/

is it just me or is the day passing like its a million years...

2009-06-29T16:37:00.006+08:00

i've been looking happy and laughing loads today :X but that's just a cover...
like when they say dont judge a book by its cover...
well all i know is that today well walking home, i heard you're favourite song... it reminded me of you playing the guitar and singing that song with me... and somehow today everything comes with a message... i think it's just me though...
well somehow you're just stuck in my head huh! i dont know bout wednesday but i just really dont know okk...
sometimes i just wish i could just be a normal kid who just studies well and just be herself but now i'm just so used to putting a cover in front of my friends... seeing me happy and cheerful... i wish i was that but sadly i'm not feeling that way though...
5 months and it flew past just like this and now 1 day seems to me like a million years...
i just want the days to pass right now... i just want it to be a friday night then i can talk on the phone all night and the next day go to church to help out in the event and on sun have church...
church is my only relax place now... no stress... friends that i can share my thoughts with, friends that i can just spend time with and have a blast but no i have to go through this day and tuesday and wednesday and thursday... i just want it to be a friday already...
i really hate this feeling...
well not much of a colourful post huh... i guess you could say sad... now this is the only place i can review the real me inside. i guess...

signing off
phoebe...

sometimes i just wish that one day
i'll be loved by a person who truly loves me and not nothing
else...
well i wonder when that day will
come...
sometimes i just want to sleep and
never get up.
its just so hard to live in a life i'm
in...
a cover that everyone falls for, no
one understands me,
just simply
horrible.

i hate this part right here...

i'm done and over with pretending ok!

2009-06-28T22:00:00.006+08:00

im done and over like the title said.

i'm soo freaking tired of pretending already.

yeah i look happy on the outside but do you really know who i am?

so stop pretending you know who i am cause you dont

i dont even know myself anymore.

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i'm asking myself today , tonight. is it worth shedding a tear for you? are you even worthy enough for me to shed a tear for you?

i dont know if i should be angry or sad or just stoned.

i dont know how you feel but one thing i know is that i hate you.

yeah you finally got rid of me HAPPY NOW? yeah i'm sure you are right.

yeah i heard what you whispered. yeah you're happy you finally got rid of me right.

_______________________________________________________________

i'm telling myself over and over you are a freak! who aint worth my tears. i'd rather shed my tear for some toy then for you. oh and thanks alot for doing this to me on the night before school reopens right yeah thanks alot! [if you're not using your brain, i'm being sacarstic here]

_______________________________________________________________

gordon,yuhern thanks for being there yeah. appreaciated but yeah its my job to solve this case.

_______________________________________________________________

well the first thing i have to say to YOU is that

whatever you do you'll regret this one day yeah you will.

i dont even know why i'm wasting my tears and my emotions for you

for peak sake you think you're sorry well i think you lied

put a sock in it.

_______________________________________________________________

sometimes i wish i didnt know you, didnt have to go through this hardship of life.

being a human is hardwork. if only i could ... ....

what am i thinking, if i killed myself i'll end up in hell so whats the diff.

i'd rather die of old age. i just need a break from everything.

love,hate,stuff....

JUST GIVE ME A BREAK!

_______________________________________________________

another dayy

2009-06-27T22:47:00.006+08:00

hah today went to watch transformers again hahah. the show started at 10.10am so i woke up at 8.30am and i was tired but got high later. why i was tired cause i sms yuhern till 2.30am fell asleep then 3.45 waoke up and talked on teh phone with deb liu, gordon and yuhern till 5.15 around there and slept at 5.45 haha yeahh haha

ok after the movie went shopping with my mama and papa haha, sissy went for debrief for retreat stuff and we ate at sushi tei was damn full!!!!

hhaha on the way queing up, i saw this two little toddlers and one was sitting on the train you know the one put coin and it moves with song yeah then the other one wanted to use so she got off then toddler 1# [girl sitting on the train first] toddler 2 # [girl who got up the train later]

toddler 1# sit on train and eat, toddler 2# comes in and parents wanna let her sit and put coin.toddler 1# GETS OUTTA TRAIN AND THE TODDER 2# PARENTS ASK HER TO SIT AS WELL. THEN THE TWO TODDLER BECAME FRIENDS AND EXCHANGE THEIR FOOD WITH EACH OTHER! sooooo cute lahhhh THIS IS A PHOTO :

okk

signing off♥♥

phoebe♥♥

gordon's BBQ &&

2009-06-23T11:28:00.004+08:00

ok reply to taggys first :)

andrea ~ okok i will ahhahhahaha

rachel ~ i knoww daopoking her was fun hahahah i also got daopok sia :(

hahahahahahah

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haha ytd faith came to my house at 1pm then we kinda used the hair straigthener and played with it hahahah :))) yeah hhaha uber fun

then fait and i headed out to the mrt and we waited for the mrt and she dropped off at cityhall while i dropped off at tiong bahru to meet the rest.

walked to gordon's house with my sis, deborah liu, david liu and and i forgot sorry!!! ahahha

_________________________________________________

at gordon's place :

we explored gordon's house cause it was big hahahahahah and he is such a rich kid and says he's poor!!! haha

then went out to get drinks and went up to the BBQ pit where the pool is too ahaaha. so we were getting ready the food and yeah but no fire yet lah haha BBQ later cause it was only 4+ 5 i dunnoe around there. then they started trying to get ppl into the pool hhaha yeahh but we (my sis, deborah and me) then the rest came tot he BBQ pit to meet us and like everyone was throwing everyone into the pool hahahah damnn funny! and soon all the guys were wet and there were only us left (us= deborah liu, phyllis, my sis, me) soooo after that we went to play polar bear and we had funfun haha firswt round, polar bears won, second round villagers won, third round villagers won and they were back to throwing ppl in the water!

they managed to throw phyllis in. then they went chasing deborah around hahahha and she finally got thrown in then deb and adler pushed me in the pool :(((( so sad rightt!!!!! then they had a hard time trying to push my sister in but in the end managed too haha soo in the end we all got wet soo sad right i know!

then we went to the water playground for a while and played and then we headed to the pool again and i was drying off when elvin and fishy threw me in!!!! :((( yes then throw here throw there i got thrown lotsa times too

then we had our BBQ haha we ate chicken wings and hotdogs and satay and otah hahaha and lesson number 1 ! OTAH IS A NO GO WITH ANY SOFT DRINKS ! THE TASTE RESULT = EEEWWWW ONLY EAT OTAH AND DRINK WATER TOGETHER OTHER SOFT DRINKS GROSSS TASTE MANN hahah

then we ate and play and ate and p-lay and got thrown into the pool again and again hahaha :((

then phyllis they all left and me my sis, deb, fishy, gordon, jethro and david lee were left and we BBQed marshmallows :)))) yummy yummy!!! then cleaned up and i forgot who carried my sis and threw her in the pool ouch man haha he litereally carried her haha poor nic!

yes changed and cleaned up and oh and lesson 2) fishy is very nice to hit so can vent anger on him hahah jkjk lah

then erm jethro walked me and my sis to the mrt while the rest went up to gordon's house and jethro left for his home haha and we reached home and showered! yeahh

it was super funfunn and yeahh i had funn funn too :)) reached home around 11 + pm yeahh :)))) haha

okk i gtg do other stuff noww ttyl okk

________________________________________________

signing off♥♥

phoebe♥♥

i'm back from fun funnn retreat!!!

2009-06-17T09:58:00.003+08:00

HELLOOOOOOO SINGAPORE!

i miss retreat alreadyyyyyy sorry i didnt post this earlier like right after i came back to singapore cause i was super tired slept through the entire next day hahahah :P let me tell you why later.

so ytd i was out so didnt post too and the day before ytd i was too lazy haha so i finally am posting it now :) it's gonna be a longggggggggggggg post so be prepared to read okk :))))

here goes... ....

________________________________________________

monday, 8 june 2009,

i woke up bright and early at 4.30am and got cleaned up and changed and got ready to leave singapore with all the things i needed. my father already went to pick my sister at 4am as she had overnight prayer in church. then we went off into a cab to the airport :)))

at the airport we went for our delicious breakfast there though i couldn't eat much cause it's too early. boarded the plane at 7+am.[i slept through the entire plane ride.]

reached malaysia airpot at 8+am [the plane ride is only 40mins] took a cab to the palace of the golden horses hotel! [40mins cab ride] and i slept through the cab ride hhaha so did my sis haha...

reached the hotel and it was sooo prettyyy... like really really huge and pretty haha :))))

so we reached the hotel at around 9.35am if i'm not wrong. so my sis sat down and waited for her the other commitee people as she was one of the retreat comm. waited till 10am for them.

i followed my parents as no one reached yet cause i took the plane while others followed the church by taking coach.

so followed parents went to mines shopping mall and shopped :) i bought a supergirl shirt hahaha :))) and bought other stuff :)))))

then took a shuttle bus back at 1.35pm

waited till 4pm around there and the church ppl started coming in

all my roomie is all on coach 4 haha soo have to wait.

so i was walking around the hotel with janelle haha cause she took a car.

and i lost my phone back cover! i was traumatized haha but oh well parents didnt scold me soo yeah. yes and finally coach 4 camee. it was the last coach to arrive hahahaha. and like almost everyone got their room key except me!hahaha oh well

then headed to ballroom for gamess[i didnt play cause i was looking for my back cover!] then i came back to the ballroom cause i stilll couldn't find anything! then got to know my group peopleeee :)))) [cornelius, lengshan, victoria lim(vicvic), victoria yue, janan , eugene, shawn, meryl and all the other people :P ]

yes then my roomies got their key soo there were only two keys and i dunnoe why but yeah. soo i took denise key cause i knew she was going to lose it or something haha. MISS BLUR QUEEN UNIVERSE[denise yap]

yes went to the room and the r0om was prettyyy and cold hahaha :))))) and it was super near vicvic's room hahah :))) like 3 steps away only hahah :))))

yeahh headed for dinner and service. :)

stayed till 1.35am and then slept hhaha on the bouncy nice beds :)))

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tuesday, 9th june 2009

woke up at 6.30am and got cleaned up :) hahah

went for breakfast! had conflakes yumm:)))

then headed for devotion with vicvic, esna and kezia. haha same region lah :))) and there's ruth and deborah liu and miss adora :)))) ahaha then went for morning service! morning service, it's 3 hours though i love services but this is just too long sorry i have to say it but it's really toooooo long... it's a killer for a morning! hahah

yes then had lunchhhhhhhh and then we had gamessss :)))))))

the games werent that messsy but we had to go into the pool for one section ahhaha i got totally wet but it was soo funn hahahha :))))

then we had an hour of free and easy where we went to bathe and the water was super niceeee :))))

then dinner we sat in a big table where we had 6 people sometimes 7 or 8 haha

me, rachel,denise,vicvic,esna,kezia and sometimes inclusive of other church peeps :)

then we had a 2 hour service! i think night services are soo much better hahah cause it's at night and the people are quite high! :))

then slept at 11.35pm haha i was tired!

______________________________________________

wednesday, 10th june 2009

we [rachel and denise and me]woke up at 6.45am and headed for breakfast with vic,esna and kezia. then headed for devotion again and had a 3 hour service again hahahahhahaha a killer i tell you! then we had lunchhh :))) and had our youth programme! MORE GAMESSS it was funfunfunnnnn :)))))))

got damn dirty haha with shaving cream and water hahaha messy messy but soooo super funn and lengshan was super deduper high ahhah and so is vicvic :)) haha

then dinner and night service! and we were sad cause it's already wednesday soo fastttt and slept at 2am

______________________________________________

thursday, 11th june 2009

woke up at 6.15am cleaned up and headed to vicvic's room which consist of esna and kezia too haha. then headed to breakfast and then devotion and then another 3 hour service!!! then we had free and easyyy from 2pm to 5pm. so we went out to mines shopping mall, me, kezia, denise,esna,rachel,vicvic, evangeline!!! :)))

haha evan came with us haha :)))

we took a water taxi for experience and it was sooooooo nicee the winddd :)))) then went shopping and shopping and shopping and ate at A&W HAHAH singapore no more :((( soo we ate there when we are at malaysia :)))

then more shopping then we went to the arcade to play haha can you believe it it's 50 cents per token and each game need 2 tokens soo like all the games are RM 1 which means it's only 50 cents per game in singapore haha we played like mad haaahaaaa

sorry evan! we bored you to tears! :/ sorry ))) you are super nice and patient man evan! we love you loads loads :)))

then headed back to the hotel and went to the room to wash up and then its dinner! hahaha :))) the last dinner we will have for the retreat! and it was the best one cause the food were the nicest among the whole week of meals hahahaha

then service!

NIGHT SERVICE!

was the super touching one! i cried and so did alot of people. God came and spoke to each and everyone of us. we went through the prayer tunnel this super long tunnel made by adults and youths and each youth will walk through it and everyone will stick their hands out and pray for each and everyone of them who goes into the tunnel. then after you come out of the tunnel you join to be the one who forms the tunnel too and pray for the others who goes through the tunnel. youth first then followed by adults.

it was the most touching service of retreat! AMEN!

AT NIGHT!!!

OH MENNN HAHA

the last night :((( so we decided not to sleep early one bit haha

vicvic and esna and kezia came over to my room and we talked then we went out to the outside at the back of the hotel ahha and walked

there was ppl playing captains ball haha our church people :))) then we headed back to the room and we saw cornelius and ernest and they asked if we wanted to play saboteur and we orh anything haha si we walked to the basement and there was noooo one at alll man except 2 hotel staff haha :))))

so we sad down on the floor at the basement[where it was at congress room ] the nice carpetted floor haha :))) we sat behind the stairs. then we played denise haha she was super blurrr she totally screwed up the game lah ahha damnnn funny... and we played it for two rounds and it was 1.30am already. so we went back to the room and corn came to my room with esna, vic and kezia...we were playing in the room and they were disturbing my toy hahah and adora in the end never come the room haha :(( yeah then at around 2am corn went back to sleep haha old already lah cannot stay awake liao haha

then we watched tv and chat chat chat we jumped and talk and we were like having sooooo much funnnnn :)))))))

then at around 3am the rest went to sleep and left me and kezia. oh btw kezia, esna and vic slept over at our room so two person one bed haha there were three beds mah.

then the rest slept haha and me and kezia were talking and watching tv and we slept at around 4am i think around there lah.

_____________________________________________

friday, 12th june 2009~

last day :((((

we woke up at 7 am haha totally we woke up and i was like omg! it's 7!!! then everyone popped outta bed and kezia, esna and vic went back to their room cause they haven't packed finish yet tsk tsk haha me, denise and rachel already packed soo we went to wash up and my mama came to double check how i pack my luggage :P hahaah then we left with our luggage saying goodbye to our beloved room :((((( and went to vicvic room and waited for them.then all of us wnet to the ballroom to put luggage except me and kezia cause i taking plane, kezia taking car. then my dad took my luggage and kezia's dad took hers.then we went to breakfast with adora too :))) then we had a cheers and esna took the cup with the rose inside in the middle of the table and cheers cause she no cup hahah then we left for service. i couldnt stay awake in service man haha toooo longg and we were all dozing off hahah :PP then i went outside the ballroom half way through service with vic and saw janelle and nicholas and his friend and david liu :))) then we chatted i took hot water to wake me up and we chatted to make ourselves abit higher haha and went back in.

then after service was lunchh our last meal together :(((

awwwww!!! yes then we waved goodbye and i left with my parents!

________________________________________________

yes it's sadddddddd i wanna go back retreat!!!!! i kinda miss them like we see each other everyday and suddenly i only see them once a week gosh mann hahah okk i blog finish le very tired now gotta goo now :)

________________________________________________

ok ytd went to watch drag me to hell and i swear! I AM NEVER EVER EVER WATCHING ANOTHER HORROR MOVIE AGAIN!

ENDING SOOO SUCKISHHHHH SOOO SADDD LAHHHH

HAHAHAHAHA OOKKK MEL AT MY HOUSE NOW GOTTA GO

signing off♥♥

phoebe ♥♥

AWAY TO RETREAT!!!

2009-06-07T22:47:00.002+08:00

reply to taggys :)))

rachel : ahaha awwwww it's okay haha i get to check in at 3pm and you guys are only coming in at 5pm hahaha i told you to take plane but you dont want haha so oh well haha see you there!!!! cant waitttt

denise: haha yes yes you little monkey rocks hahahaaaa

miane :))) :

COOKIEEEE... i miss you loads okk will relink soon :)))

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

okay!

heyheyy people! i'm going to KL tmrw with my beloved church and beloved church people :))) they rock my socks :))

haha i cant waittt mannnnnn haha will be back on the 12th soooo wait for me yeahhh hhaha blogging will regain on the 12th maybe i might use my friend's laptop in KL to blog who knows hahahahah sooo

will miss you all

and 2/5 cant wait for the outing!!! update me soon kk :)))) lovelovesss

okidoki off to pack finish and sleep cause tmrw gotta get up at 4 am? around there haha yeahh sooooo byebye :)))) lovelove talk to you all soon okay :)))

loveloves

sigining off [no hearts cause i'm using sis com not mine haha]

phoebe! :)

im backkkkkkk

2009-06-05T16:00:00.003+08:00

reply to tagboardssss :

gabwai ~ haha yessss i miss you tooo hahaah :)))))) will link youu soon :))))))))))) lovesss

beatrice~ ahah you spelled your own name wrongly gosh! ahhaha yes yes our spastic facessss ahhahahaaaaaaaa

denisee~ haah haha yah lah i spastic she spastic and you crazily spastic :P

crystalll~ heyheyyy crystalll long time noo see hahah yess i cutt bangs :D

cheryllll.a~ hahah yesyes one word fatullah ahahah whatever hahahaha goodluck tonight and you arh scare me i thought what you write on my tagboard chey only the fatt [fatullah] only what! aiyo hahahaha

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

hellooooo

i went to cheryl's performance on sunday and

it was awesome :) hahaha cheryl augustine sooo sexy :))))) hahaha. today i went to pulau ubin for a dry run of what we are going to do for the grace family day event yeahh hahaha soooo cool ahahaha im going to know things that people dont know and soo exciting hahah

driven back home and now typing this after my nice bath!!!

can i ask you people... am i nice to bully??? why does everyone like to bully me? of all people me?

i go to rehearsal and people bully me they keep ka ciao-ing me haha I VERY NICE TO KA CIAO IS IT!? :(

maybe it's because i'm the youngest there...

in church i get bullied by people too :(((

like how kirby and joshua lui thinks i'm gullible and likes to trick me! and joshua lui claims that i bully him :O! helloooo im sooooo INNOCENT cann!!!

then that denise yapp sooooooooo eeeyeeerrr always disturb bully me ahha but i bully her back soo its fair!

then in school!!! juli also bully me! evilllll people!

its either they say i like somebody and it spreads or they just like to pat my head! :/

sooo my question is

AM I THAT NICE TO BULLY?????

answer me on the tagboard! thanks

yeah sooo

cheryl augustineee sorry i wont be able to make it tongith really really sorryy well goodluck tonight yeah :)) and goodluck to you and everybody in the performance yeah ;) heh heh hehhh...

and isabelle! sorry about last night k! sorry my parents last minute dont allow...

well to all people!

retreat is coming in two dayssss yipeeee!!!!!!!!!

cant cant cant cantt waitttt!

well see you in malaysia haha cause im taking plane hahaha i'll reach at 8am and you'll reach in the afternoon hahaha

so people please do not i repeat DO NOT sms me from the 8th june till 12 june as i will be overseas in KL thankyou ;))) greatly appreciated :)))

sigining off♥♥

phoebe♥♥

games dayyy :DD

2009-05-27T22:43:00.002+08:00

hey everyoneeeee :DD

today was games day loads of funn :DD

though i didn't play any games because i'm scared of ball if you don't know yes i am scared of balls and there was captian ball and netball and basketball in the games so i decided not to play. i wanted to do badminton but like since people took it so okay then i shall be a supporter/spectator. *giggles*

went around the venues of the games/competition to cheer on class 2/5 my class :) and we had white and blue ribbions on our head for the whole 2/5 and we used eyeliner to draw our faces writting "2/5 '09" yeah but basically it came out cause everyone forgot it was there and rubbed it off or sweat/perspire it off :))

yes it was fun though we didn't win any game, it's okay it's alright as long as we are happy and we know that we did our best ya ;) win or lose I LOVE YOU 2/5 :) ♥♥

yes so i'm going to sleep like soon so yeah i shall end here for today :)))

nightsnights to everyone i hope you guys will all have a great sleep and dream okay :) God bless

signing off

phoebe♥♥

sunday lunching and camwhoring :DDD ♥♥

2009-05-25T16:25:00.006+08:00

shot by beatrice! man i look retarded hahahha :P

cheeseee behind the rock :O

smile & wind blows and spastic face appears hahaha

haaaaa timer rush! hahaha turns out kinda sweet haha

smileeeeeee

meet my new best friend! her name is treeeee & horrible hair much ewwwwwwwwwww

emo-ing much?

awwwwwwwwwww smile smileeeeeeee

i love you beatrice :DD ♥♥♥♥

YESSSS almost all the pics are here some pics cannot be seen so yeah and some pics are erm horrible hahahaha no good pics hahahaa anyway i had alot alot of fun with beatrice haahahhahahaahhahahahahahahahahaa love you loads girl ♥♥♥♥

signing off :

phoebe ♥♥

HEY ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

2009-05-25T16:14:00.002+08:00

HIHI ~ yes you guess right! i finally updated my blog and now it's gonna be alive since its a week away from june holidays YIPEEEEEEEEEEE hahaha

YESTERDAY :
yesterday had revival service and i am surely revived! prayed for abigail weeeeeeee & rachel & beatrice & many many ppl :D yes and i indeed cried and abby prayed for me and grace together :D hahaha THANKS ABBY hahaha ohhh and grace :DDDDDDD awwwwwww hahaahah
vic was being the tissue lady hahaah well she did a great job being a tissue lady :D hhaha
i drew closer to God & God spoke to me. he somehow told me that though i have driven really really REALLLLLY FAR from God, he has forgiven me for all the wrong doings that i have done and i am forgiven. i felt guilty and i cried. i couldnt stop crying at that moment. he touched me realllllly alot. i could feel his presence, his holy spirit. and guess wad? MY SPEAKING IN TONGUES BECAME STRONGER & I COULD FEEL THE PRESENCE WORKING IN ME A LOT THAN I HAVE ACTUALLY EXPECTED. WELL MY PRAYER WORKED. I PRAYED THAT I COULD BE CLOSER TO GOD LIKE IN PRIMARY SCHOOL. IN SEC 1 I DREW FAR FAR AWAY BUT NOW IM BACK AND IM GLAD. :DDDD REALLY REALLLY GLAD!

yes then went out with beatrice to singapore flyer and we took some pictures haha really really retarded pictures hahaha :D
but it was really really funwe ate popeyes and laughed and laughed in the middle of meal time :P well hhahahah well the pictures will be posted in the next post cause this post is tooo long and i very lazy to move the pics down hahahahaahhaah okk ttylllllllllllll

IM BACK!;....SYF!!!....... ..... RESTRICTION FROM BLOGGING??? :O

2009-04-27T21:37:00.002+08:00

SORRY PEEPS! I HAVE NOT BEEN BLOGGING! haha oh well anyways, IM GONNA GET A NEW SKIN SOON AND CONTINUE TO BLOG :) BUTTTTTTT RIGHT AFTER WHICH IS 13 MAY!

SOOOO IM JUST GONNA TELL YOU ONE THING! I AM KEEPING MYSELF AWAY FROM THIS BLOG STARTING WEDNESDAY UNTIL MY EXAMS END ON THE 13 OF MAY! SOOO THEN MY DEAD BLOG WILL BE REVIVED ONLY ON 13 MAY SO BE PATIENT :) HAHAHA :)))))

okok back to the day ...

TODAY IS SYF DAY! GUITAR ENSEMBLE SYF 2009~
it was funn... my first ever syf haha :) it was fun actually going to republic poly seeing all the funny interesting cool costume... and just talking and laughing with seniors and same age ppl :) hahaah

okay bright and early in the morning, i WOKE UP @ 5.50am to BATHE and then changed to school uni and headed to school after breakfast. then reached school, didnt go to class, just went to ava room straight.
then had a prayer with ms sin and a short practise with ms sin and ms sin left for rp at 8.30 - 9 around there cause she have woodlands sec to take.
then it was MAKE UP TIME!
class ppl wished me luck mel, isabelle,alexa and more ppl hugged me and wished me luck :) IM FEELING THE LOVE BABY! hhhaha :)))

went to change into guitar uni then waited for the queue to shortened so that to tie the bun and gel up and put make up... [FOUNDATION,BLUSH,DRAW THE EYEBROW, LIPSTICK...] then our hair was a bun and had a flower at the side

okay all ready and i ran back to class to get something and everyone give me that kind of stare haha :S sooooooo awkward man hahaha :P
yeah anyway, meanwhile, called zenia out cause she was suppose to go support hehe :D

then headed back to ava, practise everyone prayed and left for rp!

when we reach REPUBLIC POLY [rp], we settle down in the waiting area then headed into the waiting for the tuning room area hahaha... then met ms sin there and headed to the tuning room to TUNE of course hahahaha yes then headed back stage and wait......... our turn came... i wasnt nervous at all! butttt when we went in settle down and we were about to play suddenly a gush of diff environment and atmosphere and i "jiggled" hahahahaahhaah yes. we did okay! i guess.... ..... kinda rushed a little at the end of the fast song. but hopefully it'll all be okay!

then went back to school at 1.10pm and we didnt need to go back to class we were allowed to head home straight away :) soo went to SUBWAY with regina and jia yun and we sat there for like 2 hours or so and talked and eat haha yes then went to popular and then home...

i'm soooo scared for tmrw's result!!!! i cant wait to know but im sooooooo afraid of what we will get! !!!! AHHHHHHHHH
okay gonna go now byeeee

TMRW WILL BE THE LAST DAY I BLOG UNTIL 13 MAY OKAY! HAHAAHHA :) OHHHHH TMRW'S RESULT AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
okk bye bye i'll post the results here tmrw so yeah bye :)

BAGGGGGGGGGG

2009-04-13T22:47:00.003+08:00

hey ppl sorry for not posting for soo ooooo long haha

i've been preparing for syf and exams together cause apparantly, my syf is 2 days before my mid years! like bleah! haha

studying hard sooo i can or might have a chance to go express or at least through-train. haha

okay anw, i fell in love with the songs the climb by miley cyrus(though i dont like her haha), the potential break up song - aly and aj, can i have this dance - hsm3 and you're not sorry - taylor swift.

haha

i dont know why heeh anyway gonna sleep so yeah! :D oohohohoh

and i bought my new bag! its looking at you... you will understand wad i mean after you see the pic below haha :) :D

ohoho going out with qian wen/joanne, denise, valerie and beatrice was fun SHOPPING CAN HELP YOU MAKE NEW FRIENDS FAST! i dont know them met beatrice 2 times, valerie once and suddenly we're like friends that knew each other for a long time. laugh and laugh ahha :D shopping helps :) haha

my BAG! >>>>>>>>>>>>

DAVID ARCHULETA VIDS COMING ON NEXT POST...

happy birthday seereen and omgdness!!!! DAVID ARCHULETA IN SINGAPORE!~

2009-04-07T22:46:00.001+08:00

happy birthday seereen! :)
MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME TRUE AND GOD BLESS YOU :D

yes anyway, i went to the david archuleta autograph session! it was loud, deafing and full of cuteness haha :D though i had taken it from the top level haha but he smiled and wave to my camera like awww:D hahaahah okayu i'm gonna post the vids ahha :D if cannot, it'll be on my facebook but i aint posting the vids today not free. i'll post it another day! patients okay :D love you all :)

DAVID ARCHULETA SOO CUTE!

first vid post failed :( more info on week!

2009-03-22T22:13:00.002+08:00

okay ppl i'm gonna start making videos of posts instead but that is provided the blogger actually accepts to let me load my vid up the blog argh! haha okk anw i'm thinking of starting a youtube channel haha anyone wanna join me? we can make a mini show haha we can do anything on it like isng, go crazy, laugh and many more :D we can do it at my house or even outdoors :D haha wanna join me tell me kkk :DDD i cant wait!

ok anw on thursday & friday, i had guitar camp! it was fun but last year was funnier haha :D haha anw yeah had fun and thursday night i slept for 3 hours some didnt sleep at all example : regina,emelyn,jia yun .... haha yeah.... i wanted to stay up with them but yeah :( haha
yup in the vid will have more info on camp but mean time, i cant upload it so yeah just wait k ;D okk gtg love you all

p.s damn it tmrw got school :( oh well at least i get to see my friends i miss for a week !!! :D

ESCAPE THEME PARK!

2009-03-17T23:33:00.003+08:00

MY FIRST VISIT TO ESCAPE THEME PARK WHEN I KNOW THINGS!

my actual frist time visiting was actually when i was like primary 1/2 i think.

yeah anyway, i had fun in escape YESTERDAY, 16032009

i didnt post last night after i came back i was super tired i fell asleep at 8pm haha :D

yes met shermaine they all and headed to eat i got to meet new ppl like nicole ang and kowk see teng haha :D

yes okay it was raining so we so we waited at burger kings then headed in to escape went for haunted house and carnival and took the chop so we can go in again and went out to shermaine's kaceng's chalet haha
we played STRIP SCISSORS PAPER STONE and my group won so haha yeah no need strip :D haha damn fun then after the game, the sun came out and we went to escape again.

in escape this time, we took the mini roller coaster first and we screamed for fun it was super shiok!
then took the superman thingy damn windy then headed for the viking ship/pirate ship wahh that one damn fun! haha first time wasnt soo high second time it went damnnnnn high! i was sooo scared cause i'm scared of heights and we screamed like hell now my throat pain haha :D
then went with my BLUEBERRY to take the wet and wild. i sat at the back and guess wad i got super deduper WET! haha but it was damn fun.
i was super coldddd and took the mrt sitting on the mrt seat with wet butt haah and went home. i slept at 8 cause i was damn tired and now i'm tagging which is the next day aka, 17032009 :D haha :) okay lah thats all. i left out alot of info cause i lazy type hehe okk byeee

thanks everyone in escape i had loads of fun! and got to know new ppl haha okk byeeeeeeee

RETREAT!!! oh and look cheap plane flights to KL only in 1 hour! details here!!!

2009-03-15T20:24:00.006+08:00

I AM SOOOO EXCITED FOR RETREAT!!!
triple sharing again!!!! haha i love triple sharing haha more crowded more fun! hhehe... :D
okay cause grace sadly most likely cannot go retreat :( :( so we have decided but not confirm yet lah might change but i might be rooming with rachel,abby and meeeee hahaah:DDD
haha
me cannot wait!!!!
PPL PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHO I AM REALLY ROOMING WITH MY MAMA WANT ME DECIDE LIKE NOW CAUSE SHE WANTS ME TO SIGN UP AS EARLY BIRD HEHE...

oh and p.s:
okay i checked the website of the cheap flight to KL in 1 hour than riding in the coach for 5 hours though its fun but go by the plane and get to explore the hotel faster than everyone else!!! haah and the best part its with MEEE jkjk lah hahahh ;D

okay its okay if you taking the coach instead lah my mama just asking whether you guys want to take plane only larh ahah

okay the website is here

www.jetstar.com.sg

its the big promo haha for ALTERNATE wednesday ENJOY TAKING A PLANE AT $ 35 ONLY[* all inclusive fares and no fuel surcharges!]!!!! :O oh anddddd [PLUS Above our all day every day low fares, you get 20kg baggage allowance, free online seat selection, comfortable leather seats and departure from Changi Airport Terminal 1] :O
to check if i'm telling the truth you may go to
http://www.jetstar.com/sg/en/sg-en/lunchtime.aspx

HAHA I AINT LYING! oh and here are the dates for the promo cause they say alternate wednesday so this are the dates:
Our Lunchtime Madness Schedule
18th March 2009
1st April 2009
15th April 2009
29th April 2009

i would love if you came and join me in the plane ride! haha

READ IT AND BE AWARE OF IT AND POP YOUR EMAILS TO THE TAGBOARD NOW! OR YOU'LL REGRET!

2009-03-14T22:24:00.002+08:00

LISTEN UP!
i might be making this blog private in 2 weeks time. so you ppl will have time to put your emails in the new tagboard provided so that i can add you and you'll be able to view my blog again okay. i'm making it private for some reasons lah :D

THE TAGBOARD WILL BE BELOW MY USUAL TAGBOARD THAT YOU CAN TALK AND CHAT IN IT. DO SCROLL DOWN AND PLACE YOUR EMAIL THERE THANKS :D

AFTER two weeks, i'll lock my blog and if you havent give me your email, just sms me or give me a call or go to http://www.phoebe--phoebe.blogspot.com/ to put your email there and i'll add within two days max. so you ppl better read this okay! thanks love you:D

MUST BE AWARE!!!!! I DONT WANT TO MISS YOU OUT! CAUSE I LOVE YOU TOO :DDDDD

another day, another week.....LISTEN UP!~ READ OR YOU'LL REGRET!

2009-03-14T22:03:00.003+08:00

hey everyone,
it's almost the end of the week and next week is holidays. to me this holidays isnt much of a holiday... not compared to the jc ppl and stuff lah they more busy but still, i have guitar on monday and tuesday. thursday and friday is guitar camp. so i only have wednesday. but at least mu cca guitar only have the practises in the morning from 9-1pm :D and thursday & friday is camp so yeah. its not as bad lah but i have loads of homework too so like yeah.... ahah

okay results the worst time to have. my parents saw my results and "lectured" me. well it is quite obvious they will lecture me lah ahah...well cause my results arent that good. yeah so like yeah...

okay i'm like rushing for homework and stuff so like yeah. okay i have a news okay! and its IMPORTANT! if you dont follow what i say you can never see me post again... wait you wont even be able to see my blog again! so
LISTEN UP!
i might be making this blog private in 2 weeks time. so you ppl will have time to put your emails in the new tagboard provided so that i can add you and you'll be able to view my blog again okay. i'm making it private for some reasons lah :D

AFTER two weeks, i'll lock my blog and if you havent give me your email, just sms me or give me a call or go to www.phoebe--PHOEBE.blogspot.com to put your email there and i'll add within two days max. so you ppl better read this okay! thanks love you:D

hey my loves :D

2009-03-12T17:35:00.002+08:00

okay this week is great until a certain someone ruined it for me! oh well haha life goes on! :D
oh well, i still love everyone lah :D

school this week was fun & boring at the same time! the last week of the term! oh man i cant wait for holidays :D
i'm excited in all the wonderful things that had/has/is going to... happen. :D

now i have prayers to make and i need anyone who sees this to pray along too:) thank you

DEAR GOD,
~i pray that you will bless all my teachers whether they are ill, stressed or anything, that they will continue with their teaching and their health will be great and healthy:) because we love them!
~Lord i also pray that all my church friends/girlfriends/besties/cellys/church ppl that they may go to this years retreat 2009! i pray that they will be able to go so that we can bond and bond with God more and together:D
i also pray that anyone who is sick/tired/stress/depressed or anything negative to be alright and you God will solve all their problems :)
~Lord i also pray that you'll guide me more as i dont feel your presence as much like last time. i have drawn far from you and i can feel that i'm coming back to your presence slowly:) i pray that through this years any church event esp retreat/rhema will help me draw even closer to you.
~i also pray that everyone will draw closer to you and those who dont know you, or havent acknowledge you, will come to know you and accept you into their lives :)
~ God i also pray that you will bless melissa and that she may come to know you one day :) i also pray that all my besties will be closer or come to know you if they havent :D
and all in Jesus most precious name,
AMEN~

I LOVE EVERYONE OF YOU:D my updated blog haha ":D oh and you cant view my past posts already cause i didnt put the achieves in the blog so yeah do visit my blog often to see the post before it dissapears :D haha

PICTURES!!!!! YIPEEEEEEE

2009-02-28T20:25:00.003+08:00

THIS ARE SOME OF MY PICS HAHA I VERY BORED SOOO I DECIDED TO TAKE PICS!

haha... i know i very zilian... butttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt i was bored lah ahah and farisya said that my blog has no pics haha and that makes it dead! haah :D okk okk haha... :D

haha sooo here you gooooo haha i know it's gay lah the pic haha...:D

today is the "screaming crazy" day!

2009-02-27T21:17:00.002+08:00

okay firstly i wanna reply to my tags!

KELLERRRRRRRRRRR ONGGGGGGGGGGGGG
you are pretty lah dont degrade yourself!
and see your names in caps now hahahahahahaha!
:D love you and thanks for all the jia yous in msn arh!!!!

okay
to the day:

today we did ridiculous things...
we had english in the first two periods and did a crossword puzzle for the first period and went to the library for the other period and i borrowed a SCANDALICIOUS BOOK! hahaha it's SCANDALOUS! :O

then headed for PE and had running bleah bleah bleah yeah then we headed to soccer playing~

andddd it was a TYPICAL BIMBOTIC SOCCER GAME!
hahah cause as we play, our class bonded again butttttt
as the ball came, everyone kick the ball and scream at the same time like scream as in scream on a high pitched volume hahaha it was super funny!
then the funniest of all was me! EMBARRASSING MUCH!

the ball came to me and i know i suck at soccer but i still tried haha i kicked the ball buttttt when i look down, i kicked the air instead THE BALL WAS STILL ON THE FLOOR AND DIDNT MOVE! hahaha i kicked the air! and the other funny thing is that the teacher kicked the ball and it flew super high and it was over my head and it was coming down... i dodge and ran away and everyone started laughing including me!
i couldnt stop laughing at both incidents! haahhhahaha really i laughed till i had stomache pain! sooooo remember dont play soccer with me cause i SUCK! hahahahah...

then math same got kept back during recess and yes drank my drink to make myself full cause i had no time to eat as i needed to change into my blouse to feel refreshed and everyo9ne say i smell like JOHNSONS BABY MILK BATH?
haha yeap it's true! i bathe with johnsons baby milk bath and apply johnsons baby milk lotion for smooth skin especially to prevent me from having rashes haha... yeap! i smell MILKY!!!!

yeap and the school passed on normally and left for home... yeah it was another normal school day except for the soccer part! haha

HELLOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!♥

2009-02-26T19:15:00.005+08:00

HEYY MY FELLOW EARTHLINGS/ALIENS/BOOGGGERBURGERS!

hahaha i'm in my high normal crazy self right now haha as you can tell by the starting of this post!

okay lets reply some tags!

MELISSA!

yeap hike was fun but tiring man!!!! you super fit girlfriend dont feel tired at all!!! ahha loveyou!

JANELLA!

yeapp!! your name is in caps in the post haha and it is now again! hahahaha loveyou!

MIRABEL!

after i see mel's tagboard i understand why you were blocked haha you totally spammed her tagboard hahahha were you like super bored... lol hhaa loveyou!

and now the tagging replys have come to an end! *TADAAAA!*

okay today was okay!~ i went to school reluctantly ahha cause i was freaking tired! seesh i didnt want to go to school today but i still did!

so i went to school half dead and became high half way through, though i was tired, i still had fun like my normal days haha...

okay then stayed back for honours day rehearsals cause i performing with my cca... so boring mannnn

then went to buy my favourite bubble tea! MANGO ICE-BLENDED WITH NATA DE COCO AND RAINBOW JELLY AS TOPPINGS! YUMMY!!!

haha yeah then headed home of course haha...

hahahahahhahaa

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

haha

okay i dont know what to post about now! haha well all i can say is that ... wait nevermind. i forgot what i was going to say haha...

i'm going to paint my art piece now... and if you realised that i have not been using short forms in this post because i need to start speaking in proper english ahha for fun :D

♥love you all!

phoebe!♥♥♥

THE "HORRIBLE" general leadership programme... yet still quite funn

2009-02-25T18:47:00.004+08:00

i am confessing that i'm TIRED, HAVE HURTING LEGS & BLISTERS ON MY LEG!!!!!!!!!!!

okay to day i had general leadership program...(glp)

here is how it goes!:

it started off as going to school in the morning same time as usual,

going to class wearing my house tee and my 3/4 pants...

headed for assembly then went to ava for briefing...

we then met our trainers and drew a flag and made a group cheer and name... my group consisted of audrey,shermaine,gemma,alexa,melissa,zenia,samantha and hazel.

and our trainer was linda! and we came up with the name of our group called, CHOCOLATE RUSH!

headed out of school and took 163 from toa payoh interchange and dropped of at somewhere near bishan i think...

then started walking... we walked and walked and walked metres and metres climb and climb go down slopes again and again...

it was soooo steep!!!!!!!

okay yeah we walked 15-18 km in total! super alot can!!!!! napfa only 2.4 leh! hahaha it was super tiring and it wasnt fun... all we could do is walk and drink water...

we couldnt eat along the way cause of the stupid MONKEYS!!! and we couldnt have our lunch till we reach our destination which we reached at 2pm!!!!!! we were starving...

buttttt somehow, the walking and the tiredness, made us hungry but we weren't in the moood to eat at all...

i hate it... it was freaking tiring lah!

now at home i just dont wanna get out of my sit and just stay there until i go lie on my bed and sleep.... my legs hurt and my feet have 2 blisters seesh!!!!!!

haha but good thing the blisters werent sooo bad.... jsut a few days, it'll disappear... haha

buttt i find it fun as well...why you ask? cause i gotta spend time with my friends! haha it was sooo funn spending time with them... hahaha i love you all ppl:DDD

oh and thanks shermaine and zenia haha cause i almost fall and you guys pulled me up the steep thingy before i fell to the ground haha thankies:D

and thanks to everyone in the group! though we complained and nagged and all, we helped each other get passed the forest/jungle/"monkey heaven"and when we reached our destination we were all relieved... it's been fun working together:D and of course thanks to our trainer linda!!! ahha though your facial expression keep making us THINK that we're going the wrong way but it's correct! hahaha

yeap at home just ate it's 8.34pm right now! and i'm freaking tired and i feel like sleeping so nights ppl i shall sleep super de duper early today! i have noooo energy left at all i feel half dead! man..... haha okk nights...

emo gone here comes the high PHOEBE~

2009-02-24T22:31:00.003+08:00

i'm feeling better today i have to go sleep like now cause i have general leadership programme tmrw and it's a full day thing from 7.45 am to 5pm i have to go now cause it's 11pm and my mum will scold so yeah... i'll make this short... thanks everyone for cheering me up today i'm fine now... i'm hyper active today form all the chocolates i had in the MORNING so i had a sugar rush today and apart from that, i became super high cause almost all of my teachers didnt com today so yeah we had like super fun today cause it was super free haha but had hist test it was okay lah! haha okk gtg byeee eeeeee loveyou all i'll post tmrw more about the glp(GENERAL LEADERSHIP PROGRAMME) i'll specifically tell you what happened there, what we will be doing and stuff cause i dont know until tmrw :O haha okk byeee

loads of love,

phoebe (phoebs) :DD

stay strong my dear!

2009-02-23T21:29:00.003+08:00

oh phoebe! stay strong! don't cry for such stupid reasons! i know it's not hard to forget and get over it... but just stay strong phoebe!

i ruined the whole day just for you! i went emo in class! i cried in class without being realised but i was gloomy the whole day thanks to you! i cant believe i still cant get over you!

it's useless just wasting my precious tears for you!

why why! why cant i just get over you already!

trying to force myself to stay strong is soo difficult!

dang it! i hate this stop it phoebe! stay happy!!!

mel, lexy sorry i made you guess worried and stuff it really isnt your fault lah it's his... yeah... sorry! iloveyou too thanks for the cheer up letter mel, lexy and samantha and thanks everyone for trying to cheer me up today!

thanks keller, janella for lending me a listening ear as well... it helped loads!

if "YOU" are reading this, i am really sorry! it isnt my fault she got jealous! it's not my fault that she decided to leave you!!!

i'm sorry if you hate me yes, i love you as my brother and as you know what! but it doesnt mean i have to tolerate this! i hate you right now!

but still, you left me alone! no more talking on the phone at night with you! gone literally! i don't know what to do without you! all my problems are all rapidly gathering inside my life, my heart, my brain! just because you're gone!?

i just want to cry! cry everything out! though i cried in class without many knowing! still it isnt feeling relieved at all not one bit!

on the other hand, i cant freakishly get along with my mum! !^@!^@!*@%@ one day i ask for one day! we cant even get along seesh! wads wrong with writing on my OWN table! it's mine! wth!!!

freako WTH!!!

horrible day, terrible day,

i cant take it no more! arghhhhh

just want to hide in a stone! just wanna talk to someone on the phone~ i really need someone right now! someone who is just perfect for that job! i know the answer who but i dont wanna disturb her... seesh

loads of love,

phoebe!

MIYUKI'S CHURCH FUN YET SCARY OUTING! [MUST READ MAN!!!]

2009-02-21T12:26:00.006+08:00

LONGEST POST EVER~~~~~~~
haha okay i went to miyuki's church last night... i had fun but it was quite scary as well...i'll give you the full details okay! i seldom give full details cause i'm lazy to type butttttttt this is really a must to describe to everyone i know and i'm sorry to all P.E teachers now i understand why running is really helpful haha... you'll see....

after school ended!~

it all started when i went home to go bathe before i leave to meet miyuki and friends to go to her church, trinity@adam rd. when i reached home, i couldnt find my key and realised i didnt bring it out of my house i was shocked and sad at the same time cause if i didnt have my key, i'll be stuck outside and will have to go to miyuki's church smelly ahahhaa...
then i called my mum and dad & my dad just rushed home from work, open the door and left for work again! THANKS DADDY!

at home!~

went to bathe and headed out

at toa payoh hub!~

reached toa payoh hub at 6 pm, because miyuki's cca havent ended, pei li and i headed to macs for dinner as we were starving! then miyuki and victoria came to macs to meet us the miyuki called some ppl and we left for her church. reached her church and met ppl~

at the church!~

somehow, miyuki's friend brought hannah from my church to miyuki's church too haha what a surprise man! met keller, she added me in facebook though i didnt know her and i gotta know her haha haha... okay went into the church and met JANELLA!!! haha it's been long!!!! the first time hearing janella sing :O cool!!!! haha through the skit, i got to know janella's sister, jolena! haha she and janella are sooo alike! haha okay then i met some ppl that looked really familiar cause of ij fiesta last year janella brought them to ij so i got to meet them and though i forgot their names, i can recongise their faces.example, i remembered lester but he forgot me~ haha then i remember got the shocking backside man but cannot rmb his namea....oh he's called mark haha (thanks keller for the reminder haha)... and i remembered ruth but she dont remember me le haha...

after the service!~

headed to macs at serene centre then i went to get island cremery~!~!!!! cookies & cream and nutella!~!!!!!!! yummy!!!

scary part!

then we were bored so we kinda headed to botanic gardens for fun but i didnt wanna go i was scared it was sooo freaking dark can! we entered, me,miyuki, victoria, pei li and keller. we walked for a while and we turn back and saw this bunch of guys. they were shinning green torch lights and we didnt know who they were we thought they were some kind of bad ppl who is gangster and one of us scream and knowingly, that we were all girls, we screamed and ran super fast.i have never screamed sooo much with all my might and i have never ran without feeling tired cause we were running for our lives and it was dark as well... we finally got out of the botanical gardens and we just breathed and just ran to the macs at serene centre again to feel more protected as it was really crowded there~ we ran and ran~

in macs after the scary botanicals garden!
we walked to macs but while walking, we suddenly heard a person step on the drain and it was an old man and we turn behind and suddenly screamed and ran to macs! hahah the poor old man must have felt blur and like he must be wondering what he did to scare us haha but actually no we scared ourselves cause we were still trembling from botanical gardens!
we went into the macs and keller and miyuki suspect that , that was their church friends and went to ask them and they all said no and they asked javian and javian was like a...a... no! haha sooo fake can! so we didnt believe that it was NOT them~ we sat down and talk some almost cried but didnt but in fact, we laughed~haha we learned that never ever go to dark places without guys and just a group of girls! haha
we decided to go home and keller got her dad to pick her up! and the rest of us waited for the bus and scaredly too haha...caught the last bus
yes we reached home and safely home~

to the teachers of PE~~~
i now understand when you say to imagine someone chasing you to rape you/ beat you up... i now know how it is like to be chased and to be running for your life... cause through this we experienced it... haha

a sign of relieve~
we finally found out who it was...it was javian dont know him but miyuki and keller knows haha)'s friends not javian but his friends... though we were scared, we are kinda glad to know that it's them cause if it was really a gang who was from outside, we would be afraid! haha and now i will never ever gooo to botanical garden at night again!

okay thats all so remember ppl dont ever go out late at night alone, all girls and no guys and no adults and no older ppl cause it's CREEPY!!!! thank God it was miyuki's church ppl if not we would have never know what might happen haha and also thank God we had keller if not we would have ran in deeper into botanical gardens haha...keller you're like our directory haha thanks !:D hahaa
it was scary but entertaining though hahahaahahahah...

blur as ever! NO SYF???!!!

2009-02-18T21:34:00.003+08:00

i'm still a little blur today :( don't know whats going on with me lah...

today guitar, we had the stupid syf check again...then the teacher said i cannot!!!!!! ! @*#@#$%&^% i wanna join syf! as in cause i wanna go see whats the feeling like... in primary school, when i'm p3, not fit to be in the main band yet soo i cant go for syf ..in primary 5, the stupid instructor said that we were not ready and now i got a chance and just cause i forgot a small part you said no! wth! sorry if i get too pissed here cause i'm venting my anger!
i wanna go syf haah i know surprising but i do haha i want to... though i dont love guitar cca loads but i want to experience! haha for the sake of experiencing...seesh!
i feel like screaming and just argh arpikmlrawg !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !@#$%^%Q!@#$%^&%$#@!#$%

CALM DOWN PHOEBE! CALM DOWN!

well, i'm not only pissed with that, i'm pissed with myself! i just cant tell you why i am pissed with myself though sorry! i just cant!

i feel like going counselling well, for my own reasons that you dont need to know!

UPDATE COMPLETE!

2009-02-17T22:01:00.004+08:00

first of all i wanna say, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JILYN!!!! LOVEYOU!
HEYY! my dead blog has been awaken and back into life again! it's living again! so please tag me sooo that my just awaken living blog wont be sooo dead again haha...if you want me to link you, just tag me okay oh and remember i will start linking when i'm free and if i'm not free, i'll see if there are alot of request to link, i'll do it immediately if not, i'll find time to do so okay!
okay back to today's post!

MELISSA! dont be sad okay! smile more dont think about anything okay just remember i'll always be here for you my girlfriend!iloveyou!

today was horrible!i had no idea what had gotten into me! my brain was a blank after history lesson..after history lessons, it was suppose to be science. i somehow, jsut started packing my bag and i took my books heading to the locker...devaki then look at me and say, what are you doing? then i saw their science book and realised it was science and had to go to the lab... :O i was sooo blur! then after that, whole class stayed back for class meeting and i'm glad they had a class meeting our class this year really is bonding! and i'm happy that the ppl who used to hate me, hate me NO MORE!!! :DDD

after class meeting,hugged mel and went to interchange with jazlyn,liyi,michelle and alicia. headed to the bus and went home.

got off the bus and somehow i just suddenly stand at the bus stop thinking where i was about to go...and like HOME like duh! but somehow i forgot?! then headed home.

just a while ago, i wanted to make ribena to drink and i took a cup and put it on my table. then i ook out the ribena syrup and i saw the cup and realise inside got water...i thought it was a few drops of tap water so i just tilt it over on the table and water just gushed out...it was the wrong cup. then after like 10 seconds i like oh! wrong cup then cleaned up and made my ribena... i dunno wads wrong with me... i keep being sooo blur today! i had enough sleep last night but somehow i dunno! my mind is jsut a blank piece of white background now... nothing is going on in it... besides God, nothing... nothing!
until now i still dunno why i'm sooo blur... i dunno what am i daydreaming about...

someone help! i dunno whats wrong... no one can ever answer my question besides God but i seriously am blur right now i just feel like sleeping... oh welll....... another boring day but with my loving friends:D
iloveyou mel! and yes shermaine miss you too :D ahha!
loadsalove! ttyl i'll be posting almost everyday if not at least once a week i promise!

SORRY EVERYONE!

2009-02-07T22:14:00.002+08:00

sorry i didnt post for like a million long days/weeks baby!~ i was too caught up with facebook haha i can never get tired of it!

okay just cut my hair till shoulder length and now my ponytail is like a dogs tail hahahahahha no kidding! oh and i cant wait for march holidays!!!!i'm gonna make a mini movie with my CHRUCH BESTIES! i love you all :D muacks;)

this few days, i just figured out my likable word is SCANDALICIOUS i like it not for the meaning ewwww but i like it cause of the pronounciation and the accent the word can be said with ahha :DDD

oh and i got into the syf selected names group of ppl yipee yeah! i have never been to syf before cause 1) primary 2 i just started band so not up to standard. 2) primary 5 band not ready :( and now sec 2 i can get to go but it's not 100% i must work hard memorise and play the guitar hard too until i get a good standard cause there's no time! syf is in APRIL!!!!!!!!

i love school now! cause i just found out that i do have wonderful friends in school unlike last year where everyone was like I HATE YOU AND YOU HATE ME! hahaha i love my friends now:D they are all really nice ppl and i'm glad i know now cause it's not too late! i hope we end up in the same class and subjects next year too darling friends!!!

i have so much to say! okay from now i promise you i'll post at least once a week alrighty! :D smiles always my litte and biggy friends i love you one and all :D MUACKS! XOXO

MUACKALICIOUS BABY! ;)

HAPPY CNY PPL

2009-01-26T21:20:00.002+08:00

HAPPY NIU YEAR EVERYONE!!!

today went visiting in my new dresssy:D haha dressy me like haha... okk i'm very tired so i'm gonna sleep haha nights nights everyone i hope you get loads of ang baos :D lovey ou all nights and happy cny!!!

dentist nightmare!!!@

2009-01-26T20:55:00.002+08:00

okay on saturday, i had to go to the dentist and guess wad, i had 3 DECAYS!!! so i patched all of them but 2 of them had to have injection which was a little pain but after the injection no pain haha but then before the numbness wore off, i couldnt say the letter M cause y mouth on top numb haha that was where 2 of the jab took place but one on the left and the other on the right haha... from now on i brush my teeth after every meal haha no more injections please it's creepy haah... yeah after the numbness wore off, my gums were slightly pain from the needle poking in yeah so i couldnt smile for 2 days if not willl pain but i'm okay now with white shiny teeth :DDDD

a bunch of info!

2009-01-25T21:40:00.003+08:00

okay friday:
cny celebration in school till 11am it was superb funny... went out with melissa:D(love you mel) and waited for ccps friends headed home.

today, it was fun but there was one thing that had been bugging me for days! YOU _____ keep staying in my head... jsut go away...get out of my head! i cant stand it anymore everything i do, everything i see and everywhere i go reminds me of you...seesh...
i'm glad the future is bright but right now, i need to focus on studies and guess wad, i can cause you keep popping in my head... your sweet smile, your lovely hands... argh... just stop it already... nowadays, my mind is totally blank and i can feel it... like it just blank i literally cant think of anything else but you!!! maybe i just miss you or something i dont know... but all i know it's really bugging me... anyway enough said, dont suspect about what you think it is about cause it's not! ahha

today in church was just great...i felt like an ang bao though wearing that dress haha... anyway yeah cell was great and i still love church more than anything else i guess cause i get to spend time with nice nice lovable ppl and God himself.. even the pastors there are funny and i guess cause i grew up in that church. not literally in the church but grew up attending that church... church is my 2nd true home. my 1st of cause is my house haha 2nd church and lastly, 3rd, school both primary and secondary...

there's much to post but cause tomorrow have to go visiting early, i have to go now... thank you for lending a listening ear though :)

p.s: i am making a private blog for my personal stuff and just have to say it out stuff that i dont want some ppl to hear about. but not to worry, it's not gossip or anything like that. it is just about my life, about the time i spend with my beloved friends :D so yeah... got to go now cya soon all byee!!!!!!!!! :DDD ~